Big fellas doing just fine. Great to see.
Rancid Schnitzel
Posts
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Celebrated Christmas with my eldest son for the first time in 3 years, so it was a happy day.
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While it's a tradition to be positive and full of Christmas cheer around this time, not to mention cherish those we love, I think we need to follow the actions of our self-proclaimed betters and engage in some serious navel-gazing and self flagellation.
It is clear that this website lacks diversity. And that is problematic. There is only one poster who identifies as a woman and while being bisexual is a plus, she isn't a POC and most posters here are straight (white - problematic) males anyway. Clearly the poster who identifies as Mariner4life is a homosexual, but there are no others who will dare to come out on this site. There are certainly no trans people and that is a tragedy. There is an oriental tooth doctor and a goat fucker, but they don't compensate for the overwhelming whiteness that pervades here. That is problematic and I would hope that the mods (mostly straight white males - also very problematic) fix this problem in 2019.
Nah fuck that.
This site is great. For me it's like Cheers: "Where everybody knows your name and you're always glad you came". You can act like a fool and speak utter crap and all is forgiven next time you rock up. I've had a very tough couple of years and unfortunately I sometimes let that out here and I apologise for that, but mostly I just love coming here every day and reading some very informed (and not so informed) views about rugby, other sports, movies, TV, fitness, movies and politics etc. The advice and kind words I've received here have helped me massively (even the dp discussion). It's a cracking site with a cracking group of people and I wish you all the merriest of Christmases and happiest of New Years and I thank you once again for putting up with yet another year of my shit!
God Jul alle sammen.
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Great thread this one.
I’ve always been of the belief that if there is something you’re unhappy about or something you want to change then you should do something about it. Don’t die wondering. Stop complaining and do something about it. The sad problem is that there are sometimes factors completely outside your control.
I met the woman who would become my wife when she was a student in Aus and moved to her home country of Norway. It was awesome at first but I became utterly miserable with my life there as the years went on. I hated the cold, hated the dark and started irrationally hating the entire country and culture. I knew I had to get out of there and was all set to leave , but then my father in law got a brain tumour. Move delayed by 3 years. Then we finally moved to Aus. Worked like a maniac to make everyone happy. Was going well, everyone getting adjusted, wife making friends, gets to travel home to Norway with kids regularly, work awesome and talking about a move to the Sunshine Coast. Then she gets breast cancer. 4 years of hell follow with me not daring to even think worst case or talk to her about it. Then worst case happens and it destroyed me. Telling my sons that mamma was not going to get better was absolutely soul destroying. Those poor boys.
So I was at the location I wanted to be, but I’d lost my soulmate and was a widower and single dad and provider at the age of 38. In that situation you can talk to people or whatever but it doesn’t change anything. It won’t bring anyone back and it won’t make a tragic situation any less tragic. The sadness can be triggered by so many things and thankfully I had my boys there with me. They helped me more than I helped them.
So I focussed on the things I could influence. Exercise and eating right made me happy so I did that and did it properly. It helped me get through some very hard days.
Things gradually got better and my eldest pushed me into online dating. Could write a book about all that but I found an amazing new partner who complements my life and lifestyle perfectly. She and her daughter have moved in and we’ve since also made some wonderful new friends in the local community.
So I was bouncing back really well but unfortunately my eldest son went completely off the rails at the end of last year. He had been doing really well. Won a swimming scholarship to a top school, was very popular and had girls throwing themselves at him. But he suddenly got in with a bad crowd, started with drugs and went completely off the rails. Nobody knows exactly why he’s acting like this. Presumably his mother dying is a huge factor, but he refuses to talk to anyone and has thrown his lot in with the absolute dregs of society. He refused to go to school and was then expelled from the shitty school he insisted on going to. Now he’s living with some friends in a flat somewhere, refusing to find another school and doing God knows what. While I think he should come out of this ok in the end, I’m scared shitless that something will happen to him. It’s so hard because whenever I start feeling good about life, the reminder of his situation hits me like a train. If that ain’t enough, my younger brother has apparently disappeared. Tbh I have zero time for him but my parents are obviously beside themselves and I hate to see them so worried and stressed.
Sorry for the ramble and perhaps way too much info, but again the point I’m making is that sometimes total happiness is completely outside your control. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do everything you can to change or improve the things you can influence. I’m the fittest and healthiest I ever been in my life. I give everything to my relationship and my other son and new step daughter. I’m not happy with work so am looking to make changes when Covid is over. I won’t be fully happy until my son comes back to me, but until then I’ll do the best that I can to get the most out of life. What more can you do?
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I could tell we weren't playing South Africa because the game wasn't stopping every 5 minutes for a 130kg prop to get "medical attention".
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Had to chuckle that we were criticising the Boks for their bomb tactics but that was literally all we were doing for most of the first half.
Absolutely clueless shit. No depth, no structure. Been the same for a few years now. Guess what? It doesn't work.
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@virgil said in Convicts v Marxist Land Thieves - Crucket:
Smart move by Warner to face the media for the first time with his wife and girls
Hard to kick him further when he’s holding one of his little girls.I hate him even more for that. He's effectively using them as a shield. Cowardly tosser.
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Let's keep this civil. As much as I love a good circle jerk, these threads are much better with the Lions fans involved. Don't want them to leave before the tests.
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I think the issue with mental health is like many things in society these days, i.e. an overcorrection in response to inadequate management in the past rather than finding the right balance. While before, you were weak or a poof if you talked about your feelings, now it's straight to therapy or medication. Mental health should not be stigmatised, but at the same time shouldn't be idolised and almost bragged about. Ultimately mental health is a very complex thing and has a massive connection to physical health as well. I had my first ever major health scare in my early 20s. I'd had asthma all my life but hadn't really worried much in recent years. But I was living in Norway and contracted some kind of respiratory infection and had a bad asthma attack. It freaked me out. I couldn't sleep because I was afraid I would stop breathing. I sucked on mints by the truck loads so that I could feel I was breathing. The anxiety caused me to have massive chest pains and I then thought I was having heart problems. It hurt to breathe or cough. I was constantly going to emergency or wanting to go. Thankfully a decent doctor sat me down and told me that it was down to anxiety and I was smart enough to follow his advice. It's terrifying to think how severely that mental issue manifested itself in terms of physical effects. It fůcked me up royally and it was all in my head.
As I said, mental health is very complex and can take many forms and be for many reasons. Just look at those guys who appear to be living the life, with loving families who suddenly commit suicide.
Personally I've been hammered in the past decade. I lost my wife and both in-laws to cancer. Both my parents have just had cancer and my son suffered very bad PTSD after his mother died and he nearly died of a drug overdose. My saving grace has been exercise and I can't stress that enough. I remember one day when my son was particularly bad. He'd gone missing and I'd been talking to the cops. I was a mess but decided to go to swimming training just to do something. It was like night and day. Obviously my problems hadn't gone away but I felt like a different person and was ready to face whatever shit was coming. That was powerful and I have never forgotten it. Exercise is non-negotiable now and IMHO is a million times better than paying hundreds of dollars to talk to a stranger. That doesn't mean I think therapy is useless. Quite the opposite but I think alot of that is just getting things off your chest and having a sympathetic ear. I prefer friends and those I love.Shit. Rambling. I have a million more things to say but it's too incoherent. Ultimately, mental health and physical health are inextricably linked and IMHO exercise is vital for good mental health. I'd be royally fůcked without it
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The only consolation is that Akira has been selected. Unfortunately he'll probably be subbed after 20min when Scott Barrett gets sent off.
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Its pretty damn horrible that we've gotten to this point. I've always felt the book Fever Pitch by Nick Hornby brilliantly captures the mindset and agony of a hardcore fan. That book is about Arsenal from the 70s and their less than stellar run up until 1990 but I strongly identified with it. I'm sure I probably speak for most of us when I say I was absolutely captivated the first time I saw the ABs play (in my case 1985). I bawled my eyes out when they lost to Aus in 86. I'd hitched my wagon and there was no getting off it. Every loss was absolutely gutwrenching. So obviously there were the periods of agony (world cup drought) and ecstacy, but I don't think I could complain as much as Nick Hornby could about Arsenal in Fever Pitch. They had some absolutely dire times. One part in particular I found impossible to contemplate at the time. There was a stage when Arsenal were so shit and the whole set-up so pathetic, that the fans started cheering for the opposite team en mass. They'd had a gut full of shit results and could no longer give a fůck. I would never believe it but I'm feeling that I'm approaching that stage. I've gone from suffering depression from any loss in any situation to finding a potential loss to Italy amusing. Obviously I'll never cheer on the opposition or want us to lose, but it's amazing how much you lose that passion when excellence turns to mediocrity. When hope and optimism morph into dejection and a type of fatalism. Maybe it had to happen one day and maybe there are more glory days ahead. Maybe I'm just getting older. But I've never given less of a fůck about an AB team that during these past years.
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@chimoaus said in Fern Support Group:
G'day all, thought I would kick start a support group for anyone who is struggling or needs some support. My reason for starting this is my partner of 25 years has a degenerative condition that has worsened over time and is now so bad she is bed bound in the lounge room and I care for her. Can't say I ever thought I would see my wife in a wheelchair and needing me to help clean her etc.
I know many of you have lost partners, parents etc and I am curious how you kept your mental health healthy when watching a loved one's health fail.
The biggest thing we miss is the ability to do things like travel, bushwalking etc. It is only when your body fails that you realise how important moments and experiences are. Material things, money etc are not important when you can't do anything. For those with a healthy partner make sure you give them a big hug and surprise them with a trip somewhere.
My heart bleeds for you Mate. Unfortunately I've been there and it's soul destroying. People would always ask me if there was anything they could do and I just wanted to say "can you please make this all go away". It's hard to enjoy anything in life because of this constant reminder that hits you like a train every time you wake up in the morning. But I think you have try to take some time for yourself and not shoulder everything. You'll go mad otherwise.
Find things that bring you joy and make sure you do them. I found exercise helped and rugby (when the Canes and ABs were actually good) made me happy. Also talk and vent as much as you can. Don't hold it all in. Beers with mates help big time.
I think most importantly, cherish every day you still have together. Say everything you want to you say. Thank her for the joy and happiness she gave you. Don't leave anything unsaid.
I'm so sorry Mate. PM if you want a yarn or any assistance. Stay strong.
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Game was a bit ordinary. Looked like it was going to be 30 nil at half-time, but the yellow card (what the hell was that for?) changed things and then of course the ref kept blowing for tries and then changing his mind. They have to fix this shit. The entire crowd, Reds fans included, went apeshit when he annulled that TJP try. Ultimately people want to be entertained not witness that kind of bullshit. That was goddam farcical.
Anyway result was great and the Canes are a seriously impressive team. J Savea is an utter beast. I won't hear any criticism of the non-fat version. He was Lomu-like tonight. His brother was bloody awesome as well. 8 suits him to the ground. Hope his injury isn't anything serious. Barretts were of course ridiculous. What an incredible double-team. Fark we Canes fans are lucky right now. And I agree with above rating of Proctor. He was all class.
But, while the game was pretty shit, it was a magical evening for a little kid who desperately wanted a selfie with Beauden. I speak not of myself (even though I would very much like one), but my 8 year old son who refused to leave after the game. We were going to wait for TJP who was closest, but we saw BB further away and my son ran in that direction. He managed to sneak forward as only kids can and his day was made.
Seriously what a champion. He gave everything during the game (that dude seriously covers some distance during the course of a game), then immediately had to give interviews. But he then went straight to the crowd and was giving dozens of selfies. He was still doing it when we left, so God knows how long he was out there. A great player and true gentleman. Never thought my man crush could get stronger but it certainly did tonight!
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@tim said in All Blacks vs Springboks II:
Havili/ALB midfield lacks a ball carrier. We really could do with a physical 12.
Havili is simply not a top class 12. He's done ok but he's not a long-term solution.
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@Machpants said in All Blacks v Australia - Bledisloe II:
@game_film said in All Blacks v Australia - Bledisloe II:
Still think the mindset for this game is to crush the Wallabies. Can’t lose it. One more game, then it’s the B team vs Boks in London. Nobody will care about the result there as it’s just a money game. Wallabies at home in Aaron’s final home game matters though. Turn up for France in the group then they can rotate the rest of the pool stages.
No, that's not the abs attitude. It's the boks, they might take more risks, but they will still care. The same reason that foster is not coach going forward, winning the RWC use great, and the pinnacle, but you can't just be shit in between them.
There won't be too much experimentation, as the abs will have to hit the ground running versus Frances in the next one. There is likely to be a few more versus Oz, as they are an easier beat, imo
Yep. This whole "don't care about the result" thing is the antithesis of what the ABs have always been about. Every game should matter, regardless of the stakes. Even if we win the RWC, all those limp dick losses to Argentina and Ireland will still be a stain on the record. Way too much focus is placed on the RWC. Rugby isn't fŭcking soccer with friendlies and all that shjt.
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@KiwiMurph said in Australia v All Blacks - Bled I:
@TheMojoman said in Australia v All Blacks - Bled I:
@KiwiMurph said in Australia v All Blacks - Bled I:
@TheMojoman said in Australia v All Blacks - Bled I:
Cam is the 3rd option. Let him develop as such. Unless he can be outstanding and give us something we don’t have now I’d stick with Smith/Christie.
Roigard offered something different to Christie last night. His speed and accuracy of pass was a huge reason the ABs didnt have their typical late game fade.
20mins against a fading Wallaby side down to 14 for most of that time probably isn’t a great benchmark. I think we should get away from the whole “shiny new object” whenever someone has a good cameo.
They’ve invested time into Christie. He’s performed well and now has the experience. I’d feel more comfortable with Christie coming on in a big game behind Smith rather than a raw Roigard.
This isn't shiny new toy stuff. I've watched Roigard and Christie both play twice live this year and the difference between the two is stark. The mechanics of Roigard's game are superior to Christie. He's a far more accurate passer, he's a far better kicker, he's a better sniper and he makes far fewer errors.
I have no doubt you are correct and Christie is penciled in as the bench 9 for the big games but I don't agree with it.
Most importantly, he's also not a ginga. Those people can never be totally trusted.
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A team wins by almost 40 points (could easily have been 50) and apparently the ref was a factor? Retarded doesn't do that justice.
Toutai Kefu attacked, in hospital
Christmas!21
Merry Christmas 2018 & Happy 2019
Happiness Scale
RWC Week 4: All Blacks v Italy
Memes
All Blacks v Ireland, 2021 NH Tour
Convicts v Marxist Land Thieves - Crucket
Memes
Blues v BI Lions
Mental Illness.
Argentina Two: Newcastle, 28 November
All Blacks vs Springboks - Twickenham
Fern Support Group
Reds v Hurricanes
Memes
All Blacks vs Springboks II
All Blacks v Australia - Bledisloe II
Australia v All Blacks - Bled I
RWC SF: All Blacks v Argentina