Now, I am aware of what I said regarding The Apology but today my feeling on the "Grieving NZers" and "Your pain is our shame" is one of, well, embarrassment.

The level of outrage and number of people publicly grieving for an outsider is frankly almost vomit inducing. Not because this poor girl is not worth it. But because our own people are too.The next time a native baby is killed or a native woman is raped I 100% know this public spectacle and vigil will not fucken happen.

And NZ media you need to just stop fucken now with this "shame" & "grieving" bullshit.

Many people lost their jobs during covid so I choose my words carefully. My work is slowly beating me into the ground. I have too much work and it's directly the result of COVID. We have had a bumper year. I live in QLD so we have had more freedom than the other 2 major states and indeed much of the world. I work in the construction industry and we had a lot of projects brought forward for fear they would not happen at all. So my stress levels have skyrocketed through having twice as much work as I'm used to. I think I have aged considerably this year. I am horrible at home. My wife says I am distant and quiet. Irritable and impatient. I would usually come home and shoot hoops with Jr for a good hour after work at least 2-3 times a week. I can not remember the last time we did that. I have not been to the gym in at least 7-8 weeks. I come home and I collapse. As @canefan said its first world problems but my inability to decompress, go away with the boys on a golf trip or bugger off to Syndey for some good food, and shopping with the Mrs certainly plays a part. I resisted the urge to up my drinking and god only knows how unbearable I would have become to live with had I hit the bottle.

But for me, and I know it's odd to say and think this, I never went into lockdown. I have worked all the way through. I have had 2 days working from home in the last year. I have listened to and read a lot of people's comments about isolation. It's been rough, feeling like prisoners in your own home. I feel like the one thing people had during their lockdowns was a time to reflect and to heal. Don't get me wrong I know there were many people who went into depression as a result of lockdown. They lost work as well as their sanity. So please don't think I mean it was some kind of holiday I missed out on. But I firmly believe, especially during those first few months where we were still meeting people on job sites and driving into the office on empty roads, that affected me in a negative way. I have had friends say they came out of lockdown like bears leaving hibernation. There was a relief there. I don't think I have had that easing of the shoulders. A "finally" moment. I feel like I've been holding my breath for months and I'm still waiting for my exhale moment.

Again I had a job and many others didn't. I understand if people don't get what I'm trying to say, as well.

I went into the madness yesterday and this morning.

Yesterday was surreal. The local mall was dead. All the shops were open but no one really shopping. The supermarket on the other hand. What a shit show. We managed to get our usual shop in with a few extra provisions. One of the things that amazes me is what some people think they will need.

white and jasmine rice has sold out. But tons of basmati and brown rice still left. Rice is rice ffs.

Instant pancakes sold out. But flour still in abundance. Lots of instant products missing. But the stuff that will yield more meals still sitting there.

The worst thing I saw was and Asian man coughing without covering his mouth in the grocers. I don’t care that he was Asian. That’s not why I mentioned his ethnicity. I said it because the bogan chick that told him to “fuck off back off to China” thought it was important. He was a fucken ignorant disgusting c@nt but who coughed hard 3 times without covering his mouth. Fruit and vege all around him. But his being Asian made him more of a target for what will no doubt become known as Coracism.

Today was slightly less strained than yesterday. People were in cafes doing Sunday as they always do. So I’m hopeful we aren’t descending into a mad max scenario. Where TP is the new guzzolene.

In any case I’m optimistic that the worst we will see is a 1-2 week shut down. It’ll send some small businesses broke and that’s a bloody shame. It could be worse. Who really knows.

I have been thinking about the virus itself all wrong though. I haven’t really been worried about getting sick or my wife n kids getting sick. We are all very healthy and active people. Yesterday a conversation with my dad made me rethink this. He’s really shiting himself. He’ll probably be fine if infected. 62 but looks 50. Strong as an Ox and still very active. He’s terrified by this thing though. I hadn’t really given much concern to the elderly mortality. My concern is always my kids and wife. But speaking with dad and hearing my wife speak to her 80yo widower mum. Sitting alone in a house in Upper Hutt with no support system as we all live abroad. I’m a bit ashamed I’ve not taken this more seriously. I’ve been nonchalantly saying over water cooler talk “oh it’s only the elderly and people who are already sick”. Like their lives mean less than mine.

I’ve been bemused by the potential for a lockdown and such. But I’m a little disgusted with myself for being so flippant about a situation that has such a high mortality rate. That Italian obits tweet is just shocking. All elderly people in those photos. All that knowledge, teachings, experience is gone for many families.

If a lockdown means that I get a few more years of horrible shortbread for Xmas from my mother in law, hopefully another 20 odd years of beers with the old man and another 20 plus years of kiwi care packages from my mum. Then so be it. Lock my ass up.

Go Australia.

I feel sick.

@mariner4life

Step 1 - fuck video games off.

Step 2 - make him apologise to your neighbour

I spoiled my firstborn, my daughter. I'd take her to the warehouse or toy world and buy her something every week until she was 6. My son came along and I dialed it back. My daughter up until her late teens was selfish and a sook. I started emptying her room when she was naughty - toys, books, etc - just left one teddy and her favourite blanket. It never worked though. She'd just cry and cry and cry. I'd feel guilty and move it all back in. All she learned was that dad was a grouchy but ultimate soft touch. The first time I ever got through was with her Nintendo DS. We bought them for the kids as a bribe for upending their lives and moving to Oz. She loved that thing. But she went through a period of being nasty to everyone and ruining things. Like damaging things just because. I told her if she fucked up one more thing I'd smash her DS. She tried me and I snapped it in half in front of her. It worked. She knew I was serious and it lasted for 4 glorious well behaved years...I have documented her mid to late teens and won't rehash.

My son who grew up earning the things he wants and he is defo the more cooperative of the two now. He breaks stuff more because he's clumsy and intuitive and wants to know how things work. As long as that doesn't extend to small animals I think we're good.

I've never taken the belt to the kids or given them island parenting. Don't get me wrong, I've fucken wanted to. In my experience, though it's never too late to discipline your children. You just have to find your own thing that fucks up their lives just enough to make them think about consequences. But not so much that it sends them to therapy or to a clock tower dressed like Neo from the Matrix.

@salacious-crumb said in 17 Test AB to Play for Tonga at World Cup:

I'm seeing Ma'a Nonu's name mentioned, and I'm a huge Nonu fan, but seeing him in a different national rep jersey to me stinks of mercenariness, and 'tho would be good for Tonga, I'm not convinced the optics are good for the game.

It would be a massive coup for Tonga considering he is Samoan....

We are about to be a single income family. The Mrs runs a gym that will close at 12 pm today. We are all healthy and that's what matters. We have a chest freezer that is full to bursting. We haven't hoarded but we have added quite a bit to what we already had.

I'm not going to lie, I'm scared shitless. Work seemed to be really positive about our ability to work remotely and now there does not seem to be much point. We have savings and I will be requesting my Kiwisaver be paid out to some extent. I'm not prepared for 6 months of no income though. If that time frame proves accurate it's going to be dicey for me.

We are positive people and I'll push trolleys in the car park at Woollies if I have to. If that's what it takes to see this shitty situation through. I just hope it gets better fast.

Best of luck to all of you.

@Virgil I hate muthafuckas like this. The police are doing their fucken job. You looked suspicious and they detained you. The day after the largest mass murder in our history you really want to take the people protecting all of us to task for doing their jobs?!

Just fuck off. Fuck. Right. Off.

Cranberries will always have a special place in my heart in that in my first year in Uni I managed to land a perfect 10 chick in my quan study group. All because I lied about loving the Zombie song and she was a massive fan. To be honest I used to get the Cranberries and Garbage confused all the time. But I mananged to get my bullshit straight enough to get the job done.

Thanks Dolores.

Sorry I’ve been coming and going on here with out reading previous comments. But I need to vent.

Today I went to the chemist to pick up my daughters prescription. It’s not a life threatening ailment but she needs it none the less.

I was absolutely disgusted by the amount of elderly people at the mall. Just treating the mall as means to get together. There was a group of women standing in the entry at the mall. You had no choice but to walk almost up against them or tell them to move. I chose the latter and it took everything I had not to scold them further. At the pharmacy 3 more women, complete strangers to each other by the sounds, had a long conversation about hair dye. All within a metre of each other.

At the Brumbies there was another group sifting through packets of hot cross buns.

I’m not buying the “these people only have so many years left. If they want to go out let them choose..” bs argument I’ve heard from some quarters.

The entire country is holding its breath to save you. Stay fucking home! There are high school seniors that will lose their ability to attend formal, play their last footy game, go to parties and turn 18 and have their first drink in a pub. But is all good Betty. You have your 15min chat about fucken cats and “oh isn’t this virus business ghastly” while selfishly ignoring that the rest of the country is slowly going bankrupt in order to save your Jurassic ass.

Yes this is a different tone to my initial comments about missing the impact on the elderly. But this has to be said. If you’re not going to help yourselves then why should the rest of us?!

@duluth had Yan not done what he did they would have won fotn easily. Good on Ulberg he was entertaining and hopefully he's not as dimwitted as I think he is. Goes out and learns head movement and ups his cardio.

KKF well deserved. He was outstanding. That buys a lot of nappies.

As a report card from CKB they can be pleased with KKF. He saw off a very good grappler and finished him A+. Ulberg was a hard D. Gassed after 2min of the first round and no defense. Listening to him talk I don't think he's the smartest cat. I think he did enough to have another crack but I reckon he's a bust. Izzy C+. He lasted the fight. But he never got going. Looked too small on the ground and Jan knew it for sure. He got checked repeatedly on his right side but just kept kicking there. Need to mix it up.

@duluth I thought Izzy had all 1-3 rounds but the output stats in round one surprised me. Jan was 16-10 in significant strikes.

Being a boxing guy the control aspect is always a bitter pill to swallow but not in this case. Jan was busy and got the good ground and pound in.

Jones predictably blasting izzy while unknowingly insulting Jan. Or maybe he does know.

Fair result

Dominic Cruz made some comments after the his win and got chastised by Rogan then cut off by the production team. Very weird.

What is up with so many fighters missing weight these days? Askarov in this case.

@duluth I think the Brazilian was too big. His arms were heavy and he couldnt get the RNC in because of the fatigue in his arms. Kai just kept fighting him off.

Damn KKF!

KKF immediately in trouble against Bontorin.

@duluth he looked good with a double jab and quick straight right behind it. He looked quick. But Brady got it to the ground and just smothered him. Brady is so strong. Just a monster.

Got an arm triangle against the cage and probably had it not been Brady there wouldn't have been enough squeeze in that position. But Brady is a tank and got it done.