Lying on your resume
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@JC said in Lying on your resume:
@MN5 Solution-focussed. Nimble. Advocates for the client. Ooh, and a new one for the lockdown generation: Remote-tolerant.
True story. About 15 years ago me and my then business partners decided to have a bit of fun and invent a frankly ridiculous business buzzword. We came up with "Gravitortional" - the concept that as an object or idea comes down from above it is subject to twisting forces.
We casually dropped it into a number of dull client meetings and, yep, it was quoted back to us when we next met the client.
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@MN5 said in Lying on your resume:
No but I will definitely pinch that.
The first piece of consultancy advice is generally free...
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@MN5 said in Lying on your resume:
@Smudge said in Lying on your resume:
One of my relatives was in a corporate role at TVNZ in the mid-2000s and offered to show me round HQ when I was up in Auckland. Got to meet Mother of the Nation Judy Bailey just before the 6pm news and all that but the strangest moment was when my rellie was showing me round the newsroom. We reached the recently-appointed weather presenter, at which point my relative said "ah, yes, [insert name] caused us to change our interview questions once we hired [him/her]. [He/she] had never used a computer before but the team never thought to ask!"
Said weather presenter smiled at me and carried on typing out their script - very slowly, might I add.
Ah, what do I care - the presenter was Brendan Horan.
Who ?
Wiki says he lost his job when Jim Hickey returned. Was also a former NZ First MP who got expelled from the party part way through his only term in Parliament.
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@Godder said in Lying on your resume:
@MN5 said in Lying on your resume:
@Smudge said in Lying on your resume:
One of my relatives was in a corporate role at TVNZ in the mid-2000s and offered to show me round HQ when I was up in Auckland. Got to meet Mother of the Nation Judy Bailey just before the 6pm news and all that but the strangest moment was when my rellie was showing me round the newsroom. We reached the recently-appointed weather presenter, at which point my relative said "ah, yes, [insert name] caused us to change our interview questions once we hired [him/her]. [He/she] had never used a computer before but the team never thought to ask!"
Said weather presenter smiled at me and carried on typing out their script - very slowly, might I add.
Ah, what do I care - the presenter was Brendan Horan.
Who ?
Wiki says he lost his job when Jim Hickey returned. Was also a former NZ First MP who got expelled from the party part way through his only term in Parliament.
That’s the only Horan I know
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@MN5 said in Lying on your resume:
@Godder said in Lying on your resume:
@MN5 said in Lying on your resume:
@Smudge said in Lying on your resume:
One of my relatives was in a corporate role at TVNZ in the mid-2000s and offered to show me round HQ when I was up in Auckland. Got to meet Mother of the Nation Judy Bailey just before the 6pm news and all that but the strangest moment was when my rellie was showing me round the newsroom. We reached the recently-appointed weather presenter, at which point my relative said "ah, yes, [insert name] caused us to change our interview questions once we hired [him/her]. [He/she] had never used a computer before but the team never thought to ask!"
Said weather presenter smiled at me and carried on typing out their script - very slowly, might I add.
Ah, what do I care - the presenter was Brendan Horan.
Who ?
Wiki says he lost his job when Jim Hickey returned. Was also a former NZ First MP who got expelled from the party part way through his only term in Parliament.
That’s the only Horan I know
Did you have breakfast with him? You don't really KNOW someone until you've had breakfast with them.
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@Catogrande said in Lying on your resume:
@MN5 said in Lying on your resume:
@Godder said in Lying on your resume:
@MN5 said in Lying on your resume:
@Smudge said in Lying on your resume:
One of my relatives was in a corporate role at TVNZ in the mid-2000s and offered to show me round HQ when I was up in Auckland. Got to meet Mother of the Nation Judy Bailey just before the 6pm news and all that but the strangest moment was when my rellie was showing me round the newsroom. We reached the recently-appointed weather presenter, at which point my relative said "ah, yes, [insert name] caused us to change our interview questions once we hired [him/her]. [He/she] had never used a computer before but the team never thought to ask!"
Said weather presenter smiled at me and carried on typing out their script - very slowly, might I add.
Ah, what do I care - the presenter was Brendan Horan.
Who ?
Wiki says he lost his job when Jim Hickey returned. Was also a former NZ First MP who got expelled from the party part way through his only term in Parliament.
That’s the only Horan I know
Did you have breakfast with him? You don't really KNOW someone until you've had breakfast with them.
Na. He's no Liam Squire, Damian McKenzie, Jerome Kaino or Joe Moody.
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@MN5 said in Lying on your resume:
@Catogrande said in Lying on your resume:
@MN5 said in Lying on your resume:
@Godder said in Lying on your resume:
@MN5 said in Lying on your resume:
@Smudge said in Lying on your resume:
One of my relatives was in a corporate role at TVNZ in the mid-2000s and offered to show me round HQ when I was up in Auckland. Got to meet Mother of the Nation Judy Bailey just before the 6pm news and all that but the strangest moment was when my rellie was showing me round the newsroom. We reached the recently-appointed weather presenter, at which point my relative said "ah, yes, [insert name] caused us to change our interview questions once we hired [him/her]. [He/she] had never used a computer before but the team never thought to ask!"
Said weather presenter smiled at me and carried on typing out their script - very slowly, might I add.
Ah, what do I care - the presenter was Brendan Horan.
Who ?
Wiki says he lost his job when Jim Hickey returned. Was also a former NZ First MP who got expelled from the party part way through his only term in Parliament.
That’s the only Horan I know
Did you have breakfast with him? You don't really KNOW someone until you've had breakfast with them.
Na. He's no Liam Squire, Damian McKenzie, Jerome Kaino or Joe Moody.
Well he’s played in as many RWC finals as that lot.
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@JC said in Lying on your resume:
@MN5 Solution-focussed. Nimble. Advocates for the client. Ooh, and a new one for the lockdown generation: Remote-tolerant.
"Learnings" has preceded all these and IMHO brought society to its knees from an intellectual standpoint.
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@NTA said in Lying on your resume:
@JC said in Lying on your resume:
@MN5 Solution-focussed. Nimble. Advocates for the client. Ooh, and a new one for the lockdown generation: Remote-tolerant.
"Learnings" has preceded all these and IMHO brought society to its knees from an intellectual standpoint.
Abomination. I was taught that if you have to pluralise a gerund you should choose a more appropriate noun. The world has gone mad.
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@JC said in Lying on your resume:
@NTA said in Lying on your resume:
@JC said in Lying on your resume:
@MN5 Solution-focussed. Nimble. Advocates for the client. Ooh, and a new one for the lockdown generation: Remote-tolerant.
"Learnings" has preceded all these and IMHO brought society to its knees from an intellectual standpoint.
Abomination. I was taught that if you have to pluralise a gerund you should choose a more appropriate noun. The world has gone mad.
Oh man, they have let us all out on one day.