Lying on your resume
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@Nepia said in Lying on your resume:
@Bones said in Lying on your resume:
@Nepia said in Lying on your resume:
I have a formula book
Oh yeah because INTERNET!
Love the idea of you sitting at work and having to do some excel bits - "ohhhh nooooo....I left my formula book at hommme"
Well it's a PDF where I know the pages of the stuff I need.
Good god man
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@Nepia said in Lying on your resume:
@Bones said in Lying on your resume:
@Nepia said in Lying on your resume:
I have a formula book
Oh yeah because INTERNET!
Love the idea of you sitting at work and having to do some excel bits - "ohhhh nooooo....I left my formula book at hommme"
Well it's a PDF where I know the pages of the stuff I need.
Hopefully the staples don't scratch your discman when it's in your bag.
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@Bones said in Lying on your resume:
@Nepia said in Lying on your resume:
@Bones said in Lying on your resume:
@Nepia said in Lying on your resume:
I have a formula book
Oh yeah because INTERNET!
Love the idea of you sitting at work and having to do some excel bits - "ohhhh nooooo....I left my formula book at hommme"
Well it's a PDF where I know the pages of the stuff I need.
Hopefully the staples don't scratch your discman when it's in your bag.
Discman? Is that some fancy new technology that's like my Walkman?
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@antipodean said in Lying on your resume:
How to crater a career by antipodean: Large town hall with senior management crapping on about their leadership retreat oblivious to the fact no one cared - I point out they aren't leader's arseholes, company performance is on a clear negative trend in a range of areas and they only call themselves leaders because they can't manage. Because managing is difficult.
Well I've never gotten quite that close to diving on my own grenade. Well played.
I've got a good manager who is also a leader. But the 2 guys above him in the chain make my fucking teeth ache in terms of micromanagement.
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@nzzp said in Lying on your resume:
Excel has a low barrier to entry, which is both a massive strength and weakness.
Lot of companies that friends or I work for run all their shit on spreadsheets. Cheap to set up, maintenance costs are practically invisible when it is part of someone's day job.
Problem is when they want to do anything big with it. Massive ball ache.
Once I discovered Google Sheets supported live links to BigQuery and also QUERY() life became a lot better.
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@antipodean said in Lying on your resume:
Filthy look, contract not renewed. Just over a year later; "welcome back, where you been?"
I used to call that “he’s on Lazarus leave”
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@nzzp said in Lying on your resume:
@taniwharugby said in Lying on your resume:
my level of excel for my job is pretty advanced, but in my old job my boss is/was an accountant and man some of the magic he could do with excel!!
spot on, but by god it's uncheckable, and god forbid fixing it if anything breaks. Excel has a low barrier to entry, which is both a massive strength and weakness.
Of course nobody ever documents what they’ve built.
And independent testing for even mission-critical applications? Gimmeabreak. You’d never accept a professional developer saying they’ve just built something, trust me it’s fine, I tested it myself. But a 20 year old office jockey has put together a spreadsheet that may determine the future of your business? Sure, seems legit, put that baby live.
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@JC said in Lying on your resume:
@nzzp said in Lying on your resume:
@taniwharugby said in Lying on your resume:
my level of excel for my job is pretty advanced, but in my old job my boss is/was an accountant and man some of the magic he could do with excel!!
spot on, but by god it's uncheckable, and god forbid fixing it if anything breaks. Excel has a low barrier to entry, which is both a massive strength and weakness.
Of course nobody ever documents what they’ve built.
And independent testing for even mission-critical applications? Gimmeabreak. You’d never accept a professional developer saying they’ve just built something, trust me it’s fine, I tested it myself. But a 20 year old office jockey has put together a spreadsheet that may determine the future of your business? Sure, seems legit, put that baby live.
You'd be mad to not check any projections based on an excel model. In the world of infra, these models get poured over by hundreds of eyes and sophisticated applications to find any errors. Of course the liability caps from the model auditors mean the recourse isn't worth a dime, but we
typically find any mismatch to the real world comes from incorrect assumptions rather than faulty modelling -
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@taniwharugby its either hang out here or homeschool my kids...
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I'm heaps good at making spreadsheets that look pretty, and are easy to follow.
that's pretty much it
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The excel vs proper development is an argument I find myself involved in pretty much so every day.
Plenty of tech nerds on here, so I'm expecting some serious backlash, but in my career, run of the mill tech guys are absolutely fucking chocolate teapot at really understanding the crux of what you are trying to do. Their thinking is so god damned logical that the ability to seriously think outside the box is so minuscule, that I've found it better to just do it myself and keep them sidelined. When I was younger and gave much more of a shit, I'd spend my evenings / weekends learning about coding / excel tips / access tips so I could jury rig something quickly to solve a problem / issue / request as well as pick up some skills. At no point, and I literally mean no point, did any of the tech guys do the same thing about financial markets / products / derivatives / operational processes to so they could upskill themselves.
Now in the big money spending companies, this wasn't an issue. I worked a Morgan Stanley for 7 years and they had a tech budget which was insane. They employed tech grads and the first thing they did was throw them through the grinder on the business so they had a better understanding. I assumed GS, JP etc do the same things. Although I think they struggle to get the real top talent now as well - those interested in financials go to the massive investors, whilst Google, Tesla etc generally hoover up the rest.
Perhaps my previous job not such a great example as the CTO was best buds with the founder, so was basically untouchable. He was pretty good / strong at solving problems, but utter shit at looking forwards with respect to projects / builds.
Now that I work for a third-tier organisation .... we are back at square one. State owned FI's run like state owned companies. Takes 15 people to do a shit job of something where only 2-3 people actually do the job.
Hence, why I think Excel is fucking excellent, and I am a guru of it. Not because it's what I want to do. Because the rest of your programming / developing nerds are so fucking useless at grasping basic simple concepts.
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@MajorRage I'm 13 years in at a software company that's been going close to 30. I'm part of a small team of consultants that deliver our software to the clients and it's taken until this year to actually convince the engineering team to listen to us.
A perfect example. We have a form in our software with a drop down button called "Action". How many actions can you perform on the drop down? One.
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@antipodean said in Lying on your resume:
It's amazing how busy unproductive people can look. I worked with one bloke who everyone thought was a real go-getter. He would walk furiously from one meeting to the next carrying a noteboook. Never did anything productive.
Adrenaline junkies who thrive on noise and getting noticed.
We once re-vamped the processes and reporting in an IT Program Management function of a London bank. A key part was giving a very clear view of where each of the 50+ projects were, chances of slippage or budget over-run and any issues identified on a weekly basis. No surprises or angry users.
It was fascinating to watch the people who usually made a lot of noise energetically flapped about their pet projects, looking lost when there were no surprises or panics for them to get their adrenaline fix.
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@antipodean said in Lying on your resume:
@dogmeat said in Lying on your resume:
@antipodean I don't remember working with you?
Probably because I don't attend meetings.
If I receive an invite and there's no agenda, decline. If it doesn't relate to my area of expertise/ responsibility. Decline.
Going to meetings prevents me from doing meaningful work, like arguing on the internet.
Meetings rooms with no chairs works a treat too.
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@antipodean said in Lying on your resume:
How to crater a career by antipodean: Large town hall with senior management crapping on about their leadership retreat oblivious to the fact no one cared - I point out they aren't leader's arseholes, company performance is on a clear negative trend in a range of areas and they only call themselves leaders because they can't manage. Because managing is difficult.
I was at one of these wanky Town Halls when a group of disaffected employees at the back started humming "Send in the Clowns".
Classic.
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@Victor-Meldrew said in Lying on your resume:
@antipodean said in Lying on your resume:
@dogmeat said in Lying on your resume:
@antipodean I don't remember working with you?
Probably because I don't attend meetings.
If I receive an invite and there's no agenda, decline. If it doesn't relate to my area of expertise/ responsibility. Decline.
Going to meetings prevents me from doing meaningful work, like arguing on the internet.
Meetings rooms with no chairs works a treat too.
Yes, we have a high percentage of professional meeting goers in our organisation. A couple of years ago we converted to smart office with standing only meeting rooms etc. I think just as we were starting to see the fruits of it, Covid hit & then boom .....suddently all the professional meeting goers are back on form with 7 hours blocked out each day.