Lying on your resume
-
@antipodean said in Lying on your resume:
I don't care what people do during the day as long as their work gets done. For the same reason I don't subscribe to the concept of presenteeism. It's amazing how busy unproductive people can look. I worked with one bloke who everyone thought was a real go-getter. He would walk furiously from one meeting to the next carrying a noteboook. Never did anything productive.
@Crucial said in Lying on your resume:
I put it down to public service. If I talk about instilling processes and tools that were my experience gained say 5 years ago in the private sector the interviewers would often see their own inadequacies being potentially shown up.
I have even had a consulting company that was looking to place me actually advise me to dial back on what I can offer due to it being too much for the client to envision.Have seen it happen in corporate but in a reverse sense: a high functioning team requires new leader due to unforeseen circumstances removing old leader from position. New person arrives, wants to "shake things up" because nobody in the history of management* ever gets into the captain's chair and says "This all appears to be working nicely. Carry on"
Nup. Slash and burn, make a bunch of noise, collect your bonuses and fuck off after 2 years. Let the people who actually give a shit clean up the mess.
It particularly shits me when they don't have any technical history and won't listen to the SMEs.
*Acknowledging that management and leadership are two entirely separate beasts.
-
@antipodean said in Lying on your resume:
Unfortunately I've seen this in too many companies and my advice is always the same; if your document system doesn't do versioning, then you aren't interested in keeping your documents.
Yeah sorry, I left that a little open-ended. We were lucky and most of it was recoverable.
-
@NTA said in Lying on your resume:
@antipodean said in Lying on your resume:
I don't care what people do during the day as long as their work gets done. For the same reason I don't subscribe to the concept of presenteeism. It's amazing how busy unproductive people can look. I worked with one bloke who everyone thought was a real go-getter. He would walk furiously from one meeting to the next carrying a noteboook. Never did anything productive.
@Crucial said in Lying on your resume:
I put it down to public service. If I talk about instilling processes and tools that were my experience gained say 5 years ago in the private sector the interviewers would often see their own inadequacies being potentially shown up.
I have even had a consulting company that was looking to place me actually advise me to dial back on what I can offer due to it being too much for the client to envision.Have seen it happen in corporate but in a reverse sense: a high functioning team requires new leader due to unforeseen circumstances removing old leader from position. New person arrives, wants to "shake things up" because nobody in the history of management* ever gets into the captain's chair and says "This all appears to be working nicely. Carry on"
Nup. Slash and burn, make a bunch of noise, collect your bonuses and fuck off after 2 years. Let the people who actually give a shit clean up the mess.
It particularly shits me when they don't have any technical history and won't listen to the SMEs.
*Acknowledging that management and leadership are two entirely separate beasts.
I've experienced that as well.
In my situation though it was more a case of how I could bring the skills to improve the maturity of what was in place, which was what they were asking for.
The vision/ strategy of the management and that of the middle line doing the interviewing was shown as a massive gap. -
@NTA said in Lying on your resume:
*Acknowledging that management and leadership are two entirely separate beasts.
How to crater a career by antipodean: Large town hall with senior management crapping on about their leadership retreat oblivious to the fact no one cared - I point out they aren't leader's arseholes, company performance is on a clear negative trend in a range of areas and they only call themselves leaders because they can't manage. Because managing is difficult.
-
-
-
@antipodean ... don't leave me hanging.
Then what happened?
'administrative leave'?
Performance management?
Promotion?
-
Filthy look, contract not renewed. Just over a year later; "welcome back, where you been?"
-
I have Excel listed on my CV, if I work in a job that doesn't require me to use Excel for any period of time I straight up forget pretty much everything. But, I have a formula book and can quickly relearn much that I need to know. Plus, I've often found even my limited knowledge is better than most in many places I've worked.
Other than that I'll change a job title to suit what I'm applying for, but this is always done with my previous employers knowledge (and my roles can have multiple job titles).
Unlike @raznomore workplace, you really can't bluff your way through an interview for my type of work.
-
@raznomore said in Lying on your resume:
@Nepia can you send me that formula book please...
When I get back into the office tomorrow I should be able to send you a link to where I grabbed the PDF from.
-
@Nepia I know exactly what you mean. I have used Excel in every job I have had since 2005. Yet I never remember how to do shit in a new role. I always make friends with the admin teams quickly though. So that I can get a quick refresher without raising too much suspicion.
-
@raznomore said in Lying on your resume:
@Nepia can you send me that formula book please...
Google is your friend.
I do heaps of excel work including vba Macro automation so would describe my level on a cv as “expert”, however most of the time I use google as reference Material to find the best way of doing something -
@raznomore said in Lying on your resume:
@Nepia I know exactly what you mean. I have used Excel is every job I have had since 2005. Yet I never remember how to do shit in a new role. I always make friends with the admin teams quickly though. So that I can get a quick refresher without raising too much suspicion.
I had a job around 2015 where I had to use Excel sheets extensively and they were using antiquated methods of uploading and organising data ... so I spent about a week figuring out a more efficient way to do it. Which was really stupid in hindsight because then people kept coming to me for Excel stuff.
Next job didn't use Excel and forgot most of the new skills I acquired.
-
Excel is a good example of the varying degrees of proficiency on CVs.
My G/F notes on her CV that she has advanced excel skills and in her line of work (policy in Government) she is 'advanced in excel' and her peers generally don't know as much her. Now I'm way ahead of her in excel but I work in Finance (accountant) and if I put 'advanced in excel' my boss would expect a fucken whizz.
-
I knew quite a few pilots who "adjusted" their logbook hours. Seriously not cool.
One of them could have lost his licence because he went way over the annual flight time limitations for pilots when he cheated.
He was actually a good aviator, so got away with it, but his resume was complete bullshit. I knew how much he had flown, as I was the chief pilot, at his previous job. Then he showed up at a major airline with significantly more experience and talked about his total hours. Funny thing was, he knew that I knew too, and was always the first to buy me a beer. -
my level of excel for my job is pretty advanced, but in my old job my boss is/was an accountant and man some of the magic he could do with excel!!
-
Excel can eat all the dicks. It’s user unfriendliness and my technological dumbcuntness are a disastrous combo. Luckily I have young folk in the company to do it for me. I share my screen with them and get them to sort it in exchange for coffees from a cafe in town that I get free anyway.
I’m such a Scotsman.