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@majorrage said in Happiness Scale:
I was todays years old when I learned you could go ski-ing in Turkey.
Let us know what it's like. Not been to Turkey before and would love to go there to do something different.
Back safe & sound
Excellent trip
The people were very friendly, the food excellent, the snow gods smiled down on us
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@nzzp said in Happiness Scale:
I've realised I'm an active relaxer, but retiring 'from' rather than 'to' fills me with deep apprehension.
My biggest problem has always been relaxing. I jump out of bed and it's one job after another for at least 12 hours a day. When I travel I'm the one out the door at 7:00 am and not back until 11. Definitely not a sit on the beach type. Over the last few years I have tried to train myself to just sit and people watch and let it all go, but it's a struggle.
I tell people that I am ready for retirement but I wonder if I truly am. Travel is a big part of the plan. Otherwise it's just doing what I already like but with the time to actually do it.
It'll be obvious to you when I do finally retire. Either I will be on here all day (not going well) or not at all (going splendidly).
@Crazy-Horse Mate your situation sounds too tough. Eight years is too long. As for the conflicted emotions about your job. Fuck! I don't know what to say, but something has to change. Either somehow rediscover what about it gave you satisfaction or take the big step of getting the hell out. You say have to retire. Will you still need another job after that? If you do then maybe it's time now??
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@nzzp said in Happiness Scale:
Covid's crazy though, and with no international travel what the hell does retirement even look like? I've realised I'm an active relaxer, but retiring 'from' rather than 'to' fills me with deep apprehension.
Leaving your job for the last time can be a very challenging thing to do, in my experience. I “retired” at 52. I was moving back here to NZ anyway so it seemed like everything was aligning and the time was right. But when my last day actually came I was not prepared. I had flights arranged for a couple of days after, we were looking forward to living in NZ, I had no money worries. But the truth is I didn’t know what I was for anymore. I’d worked for my company for 25 years. Apart from getting married to Mrs JC, pretty much everything meaningful I’d done in my life was wrapped up in my job. That’s a very confronting thing to realise to be honest.
I think for many of us who don’t have kids the only thing we can pass on is what we know, and the place we do that mostly is at work. If you take that away what’s left? I’m not particularly creative and haven’t been blessed with the coaching gene so lacked an outlet for doing anything meaningful. I did some work with charities (still do) but ultimately I started working again because fundamentally it’s what I do. I analyse things. I direct people. Retirement just doesn’t give you those opportunities.
I think some of us just need to accept that for us it's not a bad thing that there’s no realistic chance of ever stopping work. We just need to find something different to do with our time, and as long as we are doing it because we like it rather than through necessity that’s OK.
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@jc said in Happiness Scale:
I think for many of us who don’t have kids the only thing we can pass on is what we know, and the place we do that mostly is at work. If you take that away what’s left?
For those of us with kids the empty nest looks like a similar situation. My wife looks like she is struggling with the mere prospect of it happening, and our kids are a long way from being financially independent enough to actually move out.
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@jc said in Happiness Scale:
@nzzp said in Happiness Scale:
Covid's crazy though, and with no international travel what the hell does retirement even look like? I've realised I'm an active relaxer, but retiring 'from' rather than 'to' fills me with deep apprehension.
Leaving your job for the last time can be a very challenging thing to do, in my experience. I “retired” at 52. I was moving back here to NZ anyway so it seemed like everything was aligning and the time was right. But when my last day actually came I was not prepared. I had flights arranged for a couple of days after, we were looking forward to living in NZ, I had no money worries. But the truth is I didn’t know what I was for anymore. I’d worked for my company for 25 years. Apart from getting married to Mrs JC, pretty much everything meaningful I’d done in my life was wrapped up in my job. That’s a very confronting thing to realise to be honest.
I think for many of us who don’t have kids the only thing we can pass on is what we know, and the place we do that mostly is at work. If you take that away what’s left? I’m not particularly creative and haven’t been blessed with the coaching gene so lacked an outlet for doing anything meaningful. I did some work with charities (still do) but ultimately I started working again because fundamentally it’s what I do. I analyse things. I direct people. Retirement just doesn’t give you those opportunities.
I think some of us just need to accept that for us it's not a bad thing that there’s no realistic chance of ever stopping work. We just need to find something different to do with our time, and as long as we are doing it because we like it rather than through necessity that’s OK.
jesus thats hit me like a train, we dont have have no plans for kids and so could/will be in a very similar situation, we have friends in their 50's who retired and have gone back to work for very similar reasons
fuck thats actually making me feel anxious
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@jc said in Happiness Scale:
I think some of us just need to accept that for us it's not a bad thing that there’s no realistic chance of ever stopping work. We just need to find something different to do with our time, and as long as we are doing it because we like it rather than through necessity that’s OK.
Go run a rugby club
Driving around the Port Stephens area of NSW I saw rugby clubs everywhere, and remarked to Mrs TA that I was set like a jelly if we ever wanted to move here
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@nta said in Happiness Scale:
@jc said in Happiness Scale:
I think some of us just need to accept that for us it's not a bad thing that there’s no realistic chance of ever stopping work. We just need to find something different to do with our time, and as long as we are doing it because we like it rather than through necessity that’s OK.
Go run a rugby club
Driving around the Port Stephens area of NSW I saw rugby clubs everywhere, and remarked to Mrs TA that I was set like a jelly if we ever wanted to move here
The problem with that plan is that everything I know about rugby I learned on the Fern. So pretty clueless really.
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@jc do what im doing and just use it to get your foot in the door and then start learning, the even asked me to manage the 1's this year!
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@jc said in Happiness Scale:
@nta said in Happiness Scale:
@jc said in Happiness Scale:
I think some of us just need to accept that for us it's not a bad thing that there’s no realistic chance of ever stopping work. We just need to find something different to do with our time, and as long as we are doing it because we like it rather than through necessity that’s OK.
Go run a rugby club
Driving around the Port Stephens area of NSW I saw rugby clubs everywhere, and remarked to Mrs TA that I was set like a jelly if we ever wanted to move here
The problem with that plan is that everything I know about rugby I learned on the Fern. So pretty clueless really.
You've got a fair bit of organisational experience, and I assume communication skills
That's a start. You don't have to coach!
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@jc said in Happiness Scale:
@nta said in Happiness Scale:
@jc said in Happiness Scale:
I think some of us just need to accept that for us it's not a bad thing that there’s no realistic chance of ever stopping work. We just need to find something different to do with our time, and as long as we are doing it because we like it rather than through necessity that’s OK.
Go run a rugby club
Driving around the Port Stephens area of NSW I saw rugby clubs everywhere, and remarked to Mrs TA that I was set like a jelly if we ever wanted to move here
The problem with that plan is that everything I know about rugby I learned on the Fern. So pretty clueless really.
From my experience of club administration, you'd still be leaps and bounds above most volunteers.
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@godder said in Happiness Scale:
@jc said in Happiness Scale:
@nta said in Happiness Scale:
@jc said in Happiness Scale:
I think some of us just need to accept that for us it's not a bad thing that there’s no realistic chance of ever stopping work. We just need to find something different to do with our time, and as long as we are doing it because we like it rather than through necessity that’s OK.
Go run a rugby club
Driving around the Port Stephens area of NSW I saw rugby clubs everywhere, and remarked to Mrs TA that I was set like a jelly if we ever wanted to move here
The problem with that plan is that everything I know about rugby I learned on the Fern. So pretty clueless really.
From my experience of club administration, you'd still be leaps and bounds above most volunteers.
If you can get the club set up with a Gmail account and put everything in Google Drive, you're ahead of most.
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@kiwiwomble said in Happiness Scale:
@jc do what im doing and just use it to get your foot in the door and then start learning, the even asked me to manage the 1's this year!
You're talking about the fern right? Can't believe you've been asked to mod already.
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@bones said in Happiness Scale:
@kiwiwomble said in Happiness Scale:
@jc do what im doing and just use it to get your foot in the door and then start learning, the even asked me to manage the 1's this year!
You're talking about the fern right? Can't believe you've been asked to mod already.
I’m still waiting. Maybe they’ve sent the invite to an old email address.
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@mn5 said in Happiness Scale:
@bones said in Happiness Scale:
@kiwiwomble said in Happiness Scale:
@jc do what im doing and just use it to get your foot in the door and then start learning, the even asked me to manage the 1's this year!
You're talking about the fern right? Can't believe you've been asked to mod already.
I’m still waiting. Maybe they’ve sent the invite to an old email address.
Yeah have you check insidechrisgayle@fanboi.com?
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@bones said in Happiness Scale:
@mn5 said in Happiness Scale:
@bones said in Happiness Scale:
@kiwiwomble said in Happiness Scale:
@jc do what im doing and just use it to get your foot in the door and then start learning, the even asked me to manage the 1's this year!
You're talking about the fern right? Can't believe you've been asked to mod already.
I’m still waiting. Maybe they’ve sent the invite to an old email address.
Yeah have you check insidechrisgayle@fanboi.com?
.co.nz bro. Nothing. Fuck, maybe they think I’m not up to it ?
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@bones said in Happiness Scale:
@kiwiwomble said in Happiness Scale:
@jc do what im doing and just use it to get your foot in the door and then start learning, the even asked me to manage the 1's this year!
You're talking about the fern right? Can't believe you've been asked to mod already.
So hard to believe? I always get on with everyone
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@mn5 said in Happiness Scale:
@bones said in Happiness Scale:
@mn5 said in Happiness Scale:
@bones said in Happiness Scale:
@kiwiwomble said in Happiness Scale:
@jc do what im doing and just use it to get your foot in the door and then start learning, the even asked me to manage the 1's this year!
You're talking about the fern right? Can't believe you've been asked to mod already.
I’m still waiting. Maybe they’ve sent the invite to an old email address.
Yeah have you check insidechrisgayle@fanboi.com?
.co.nz bro. Nothing. Fuck, maybe they think I’m not up to it ?
Grow up
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@jc from my experience up here (I was on the coaching side) the clubs are reasonably well run, but most run on minimal costs with the books end of year health dependent on the success of the 1sts, and the club is always too reliant on someone or a couple of someones, thankless job, overworked underpaid...but is enjoyable, even in the middle of winter in the mud and rain!
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Happiness. It's an interesting one, something I'm quite philosophical about these days as we (hopefully) are coming out the back of the pandemic.
I'd written above that we'd have to see how 2021 pans out, and lets be frank. It was pretty shit. Still not seen my folks, still working the job I'm not a huge fan of and still treading water. Sat down with the wife a few months and we had a really good chat about things and started to explore the possibility of moving back to NZ. But then I realise that the NZ I loved is gone & the Kiwi inside of me has gone a lot as well. To be honest, I have quite an irrational hatred of all things NZ these days. It's all based around the fact I feel I'm a second class citizen now due to Ardern's policy of not allowing me back in.
As I said, irrational.
So what do we do? Well, we've booked the shit out of holidays this year. So far we have Greece (all inclusive resort), Portugal (Golf / Ocean), Devon Camping, & a Villa holiday in South of France with friends (5 families) We'll also do some driving holidays, as a friend of mine in Edinburgh has just had a baby (46 year old new Dad = fuck that ...) so will go up and play St Andrew's with him & we hope to get a couple of nights at Gara rock too. I can only hope that I'll be able to see my folks, currently planned in April up here & if Ardern the absolute monster allows, will be in NZ for Xmas. Perhaps a pipe dream.
I've decided to stick with my job for another year, as it's really easy and it gives me the free time for above, as well as 18 holes once a week. My last plan is to do more mechanics. I've got my eye on a E30 BMW Two door which I intend to properly modify. Uprated suspension, black body kit, flared wheel arches & use a 3 litre BMW engine to pump it up to 250 hp ish. It'll go like stink & hopefully look the part too. Just going to wait til it warms up a bit to build that in my garage - bit freaking cold right now.
So, am I happy? Dunno, not sure. But I've got a lot to look forward to & I'm quite excited about it.
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Some serious holiday issues there mate. I hope it all pans out and you get to see your folks.
Sounds a bit sad that you’re not feeling your Kiwi-ness. Hope that’s just a transient thing.
Oh and when you’re down in Devon be sure to catch up with @Victor-Meldrew he”s not far away 😁
Happiness Scale
