Movie review thread...
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@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
At the other end of the spectrum, I watched a recent offering on Netflix, Hidden Strike with John Cena and Jackie Chan. Produced by a Mainland Chinese group, like any bad Chinese copy it was a poor version of your stock standard action film. 90 minutes of my life I won't get back
My eyes are getting old. I read that as Mainland Cheese.
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@Crazy-Horse said in Movie review thread...:
@canefan said in Movie review thread...:
At the other end of the spectrum, I watched a recent offering on Netflix, Hidden Strike with John Cena and Jackie Chan. Produced by a Mainland Chinese group, like any bad Chinese copy it was a poor version of your stock standard action film. 90 minutes of my life I won't get back
My eyes are getting old. I read that as Mainland Cheese.
I saw the movie with a native Chinese speaker. Mainland Cheese would accurately describe the dialogue and the pronounciation.. "Burnt out binfire" 🔥 would describe the plot...
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Ok so my last review was of the worst movie I had seen in ages. Well, we damn near topped it.
The Beekeeper.
Jason statham playing Jason Statham, this time taking down cyber criminals.
This movie is fuuuucking terrible.
It was either written by AI, or some boomer who is scared of computers. In fact, the cyber criminals looked like updated versions of thr guys from Hackers.
Throw in for some reason a bunch of TMNT villains for additional ridiculousness
It's fucking awful. Do not fucking watch this movie. -
@mariner4life said in Movie review thread...:
Ok so my last review was of the worst movie I had seen in ages. Well, we damn near topped it.
The Beekeeper.
Jason statham playing Jason Statham, this time taking down cyber criminals.
This movie is fuuuucking terrible.
It was either written by AI, or some boomer who is scared of computers. In fact, the cyber criminals looked like updated versions of thr guys from Hackers.
Throw in for some reason a bunch of TMNT villains for additional ridiculousness
It's fucking awful. Do not fucking watch this movie.I sort of thought it was inevitable he would join Liam Neeson, Bruce Willis, John Travolta, Gerard Butler and Nicholas Cage in playing himself playing himself….
Fuck I miss the glory days of 80s and to a slightly lesser extent 90s action movies.
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Infinite Storm
Apparently based on a real story and if they took artistic liberty with it, they certainly didn't try to make it more interesting. Scenery is nice. Naomi Watts gets naked. Unfortunately not the Mulholland Dr. version of Naomi, but the 2022 one...
Movie feels longer than it is. Probably because it is mind numbingly boring.
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@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@mariner4life said in Movie review thread...:
Ok so my last review was of the worst movie I had seen in ages. Well, we damn near topped it.
The Beekeeper.
Jason statham playing Jason Statham, this time taking down cyber criminals.
This movie is fuuuucking terrible.
It was either written by AI, or some boomer who is scared of computers. In fact, the cyber criminals looked like updated versions of thr guys from Hackers.
Throw in for some reason a bunch of TMNT villains for additional ridiculousness
It's fucking awful. Do not fucking watch this movie.I sort of thought it was inevitable he would join Liam Neeson, Bruce Willis, John Travolta, Gerard Butler and Nicholas Cage in playing himself playing himself….
Fuck I miss the glory days of 80s and to a slightly lesser extent 90s action movies.
He's been doing it for 20 years. I've actually been catching up on a few of his older action films I hadn't seen lately (the Mechanics etc) lately and did a rewatch of Snatch and Lock Stock too. I genuinely find him watchable even in the bad films.
The weirdest one was the one where he was a homeless dude.
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@antipodean said in Movie review thread...:
Infinite Storm
Apparently based on a real story and if they took artistic liberty with it, they certainly didn't try to make it more interesting. Scenery is nice. Naomi Watts gets naked. Unfortunately not the Mulholland Dr. version of Naomi, but the 2022 one...
Movie feels longer than it is. Probably because it is mind numbingly boring.
I think I might just opt for the 2022 version than attempt to watch Mulholland Drive again.
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@Nepia said in Movie review thread...:
@MN5 said in Movie review thread...:
@mariner4life said in Movie review thread...:
Ok so my last review was of the worst movie I had seen in ages. Well, we damn near topped it.
The Beekeeper.
Jason statham playing Jason Statham, this time taking down cyber criminals.
This movie is fuuuucking terrible.
It was either written by AI, or some boomer who is scared of computers. In fact, the cyber criminals looked like updated versions of thr guys from Hackers.
Throw in for some reason a bunch of TMNT villains for additional ridiculousness
It's fucking awful. Do not fucking watch this movie.I sort of thought it was inevitable he would join Liam Neeson, Bruce Willis, John Travolta, Gerard Butler and Nicholas Cage in playing himself playing himself….
Fuck I miss the glory days of 80s and to a slightly lesser extent 90s action movies.
He's been doing it for 20 years. I've actually been catching up on a few of his older action films I hadn't seen lately (the Mechanics etc) lately and did a rewatch of Snatch and Lock Stock too. I genuinely find him watchable even in the bad films.
The weirdest one was the one where he was a homeless dude.
One of those guys who's led a charmed life. Making millions being himself and bagging hot models
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@mariner4life at least the casting was accurate to pitch a poor comedic saffa as a villain
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@mariner4life C'mon the dialogue was practically Shakespearean
"There is something wrong with The Hive. I am the Beekeeper. I must fix it"
cue explosions -
The biggest question mark is
How the fuck did they rope Jeremy Irons in to this shitstorm?
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@mariner4life said in Movie review thread...:
The biggest question mark is
How the fuck did they rope Jeremy Irons in to this shitstorm?
I was going to mention him. A vain attempt to legitimise the film? Probably just did it for the money
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He's been in some shockers
The Best Movies Starring Jeremy Irons
"The Lion King", "Die Hard With a Vengeance", "Dead Ringers", "The Mission", & "Inland Empire" are on The Best Movies Starring Jeremy Irons on Flickchart.
Eragon | Rotten Tomatoes
Discover reviews, ratings, and trailers for Eragon on Rotten Tomatoes. Stay updated with critic and audience scores today!
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@mariner4life said in Movie review thread...:
The biggest question mark is
How the fuck did they rope Jeremy Irons in to this shitstorm?
What I learnt from Hollowwood: obviously everything corrupt in US politics and intelligence is foreign-born with a nice voice. Hence Irons, Hopkins* etc.
*Who can play badass good guy bosses too. What a range!
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@dogmeat said in Movie review thread...:
Olivier starred in The Betsy a bad adaptation of a really bad 1970's potboiler.
Artistic integrity doesn't pay the rent.
Yeah and I’m fairly sure Alec Guinness was pissed off that people only knew him for playing Obi Wan Kenobi and not for all his ‘serious’ roles prior to that.
I’m sure all the cash flooding in helped ease his stress though.
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Movie length doco: Shackleton: The Greatest Story of Survival
Narrated/hosted by Tim Jarvis who has replicated parts of Shackleton's journey from Antarctica to the South Georgian Islands, hosts this doco which shows the wider story of thier trip to the antarctic and the almost year they were stuck there fore Shackleton and 5 others set sail in a keel less boat to the South Georgia to a Whaling station to seek help to rescue thier team.
Aside from maybe 10 mins where they showed the impact of climate change in South Georgia and gets a bit off the historical track, it was a great historical doco.
Shackleton: Death or Glory (TV Series 2013– ) ⭐ 7.3 | Reality-TV
Shackleton: Death or Glory: With Tim Jarvis. Explorer Tim Jarvis and crew use replica boat, equipment, and clothing from 1914 to retrace Sir Ernest Shackleton's Antarctic rescue mission, going beyond the point of no return to uncover secrets of Shackleton's survival.
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@taniwharugby strongly recommend reading Endurance - Shackleton's Incredible Voyage By Lansing, Alfred if you haven't.
Haven't seen that doco yet, but will now. The book is amazing.
