El Toro rehab log.....March 2014
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<p>Wow! How is that for timing?........You guys just beat me to it! Tomorrow is exactly <strong>three years</strong> since my accident so was about to update this on the day................short answer?..........Much better thank you but still a long way to go! </p>
<p>Detail update soon................</p> -
<p>OK….so a bit over three years since the date of accident......</p>
<p>I had to think hard about this but probably the most significant progress of late is that I don’t plan and calculate every day down to the last half-hour as early on in my rehab. I have built up enough stamina now to more or less carry on every day until I run out of steam…..that mostly means I get through to about lunchtime when I take a break for about an hour and a half and then manage to again push through to about 5 or 6 pm. Still all light duty pen-pushing mostly but at least I am out of bed which is a relief and huge progress.<br>
Very difficult to peg exactly but I would guess that my physical strength is about 60-70 percent of full recovery. In real world terms it means getting on with an adjusted life…..sitting, walking, standing and even climbing a few stairs when necessary….. I still use the lift in the house to move between floors though.</p>
<p>I still do a routine of stretches and exercises every day with two more intense strength sessions weekly. I use the pilates reformer for that because it combines very accurate increase in flexibility and load adjustments……I am now on three full strength springs with much deeper movement than before. Worth reminding myself that I started on ONE, QUARTER spring! And I still see a physio every second week….ends up more brainstorming than anything else but it offers a good benchmark for improvement.... Battling to get normal agility and movement back like before the accident….. I am still locked in a guarded pattern, over-thinking certain movements instead of just doing them. Picking something up from the floor, getting in and out of a car ( still!), standing up from a chair, climbing stairs off course and so on. So your brain needs to learn to trust your body again…..physio gave me some co-ordination exercises they use for stroke patients to try and help with this…..frustrating. </p>
<p>Mentally doing fine with (almost) no anger left about the turn of events……..shit happens….deal with it.<br>
The three year time- frame also represents the limitation date for any possible legal claim following the accident……I pulled the plug on the proceedings in January after it became clear that it will lock me in a mental regress for as long as it will continue……..and it became very clear that it would have continued forever with multiple parties including two insurance companies involved. Every meeting I had with the lawyers took me back to the worst of times and no amount of money is worth that….……so…..…. case closed.</p>
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On a larger scale I have a few decisions to make…….mainly…….what to do with the rest of my life? I more or less retired seven years ago from any formal work. I then started to do all the things I ever wanted to do as described in the OP……..in reality it became boring as hell after a while and I had some new prospects lined up before the accident. Time now to again pursue those opportunities and get busy………..can’t just watch sport on telly forever??? :idiot2:</p> -
<p>Mate, I've only just stumbled on this thread and I have to say I find it inspiring and if you ever need a mental uplift or are feeling that your progress is not as you would wish, may I suggest you re-read the whole thread? It charts some pretty damned impressive progress and demonstrates a high degree of mental fortitude.</p>
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<p>Hats off!</p> -
<p>The beauty of keeping track of it all, the good and the ugly! You've made some hard decisions but you are focusing on positive opportunities which is awesome. Keep up the good work and keep us posted mate!</p>
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Respect x infinity.<br><br>I honestly don't know if I could handle that. Amazing and inspiring.<br><br>I guess the compo thing sucks but by the sounds of it you are pretty well set up financially. The most important thing is to get better and move on.
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<p>Thanks. I have read all the comments and encouragements….they are appreciated. They have also made me realize how different this entire episode looks from the outside looking in….. versus living it on a day to day basis. I have had this discussion with some of my close friends as well and it ended up……interesting. Most people are in awe of tales of recovery from adversity….just listen to the reaction to some of the TED talks etc. Frankly it is amazing what we can endure and how we can recover. It often sounds heroic.<br><br>
HOWEVER….when you go through something similar it does not feel heroic at all. On the contrary……if I can use a somewhat stupid analogy…..It does not feel like the fight put up by a cornered lion (or William Wallace!) It feels more like the desperate struggle of a rat drowning in a bucket of water. Because in reality, what option do you have?? Just die?? Stay bitter forever…. and then die?? Or get the hell on with life. Most people (the lucky ones) in a situation like mine eventually work out that the only option is to get on with life. And I specifically use the word lucky because that is what I am. Lucky. They have done every test imaginable and I have no lasting neurological damage. A few lasting musculoskeletal issues yes but theoretically I can get close to full recovery…<strong>given enough time.</strong></p>
<p>Earlier during my rehab I used to go to a hydro-therapy pool twice a week. I was lowered in the pool with the disability lift for months because I could not get in the pool any other way. At first I felt so sorry for myself it was pathetic. That was until I got through the strongest medication and was able to look at the other poor buggers in the pool. Very few were stronger than me. Most however were much, much worse off than I was. A lot with no hope of recovery at all. So again it is worth reminding myself that I am lucky. Not dead. Not a drooling vegetable. Not in a wheelchair. Not paralyzed. Just a bit slow with the odd speed-wobble!<br>
Despite knowing this, I still catch myself on the odd occasion feeling sorry for myself and very guilty about the unbelievably SLOW recovery. Why does it take so bloody long?</p>
<p>As noted, that is where this thread has come in handy indeed. It certainly helps to go back and check my progress against earlier posts and the overall storyline of improvement is encouraging and undeniable. So just keep on keeping on….as someone once said.</p>
<p>The biggest challenge now for real progress to kick in is to stop waiting. Waiting to get better can become an excuse. It makes the clock stand still…… time becomes the enemy instead of an ally. If I can manage to get busy enough….progress should happen seamlessly and in parallel with life, without me watching the clock and the calendar.</p> -
<p>Not exactly directly related to my rehab but still a big milestone this morning…….</p>
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We eventually got round to attending a citizenship ceremony to activate our Australian citizenship. We were eligible two years ago already but my little episode held us back a bit.<br>
Lots of mixed emotions so I won’t go there…. dual citizenship etc.</p>
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More than 300 people from 41 different nationalities attended and were sworn in. Was impressed with the proceedings…. Fairly quick with just the right amount of theatre involved….speech, pledge, anthem etc.</p>
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This was the biggest (only) occasion that I attended since early 2012.</p>
<p>Managed OK but one thing that I have come to appreciate of late was there in all its glory….again. Even though I am much better and manage a few stairs with relative ease nowadays, you had to go down a long and steep staircase to get to the demarcated area in the auditorium. Just out of my range. NO access ramp or lift.So we ended up sitting right at the back with the visiting families, miles away from the other new citizens.</p>
<p>I have designed and built commercial and public buildings all my life and the norm is to provide the absolute minimum requirements of disability aids like ramps, ablutions and lifts to satisfy the various local building codes.</p>
<p>It has tightened up nowadays but some councils used to let you get away with providing just about nothing. And from a cost point of view, you would not offer anything more…without ever thinking about it, or blinking an eye.<br>
Unbelievable how my perception of all this has changed now! Nothing like living it to get you to appreciate the inconvenience and humiliation disabled people have to go through all their life.</p>
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My problem will be gone eventually / soon, but this lesson will stick.</p> -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Hooroo" data-cid="488871" data-time="1430953459"><p>So who is your favourite Wallaby now me ole cobber?</p></blockquote>
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Dunno.....my mind feels a little vague and slow since the ceremony.......I hope it passes soon? Nick? -
If you're asking which Wallaby, then pick Stephen Moore. Other people seem to like him outside Australia. <br><br>
The dull slowness you feel is probably relative to the fact you're a citizen of something other than a third world country now, and are having trouble adjusting.<br><br>
Give it time -
<p>Like so many others, I just stumbled across this thread today - what a great read. It's a fantastic outlook you have on things, and I had often wondered if you were on drugs with the things you post... :good1:</p>
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<p>(seriously though, great work)</p> -
<p>
Felt a bit of a restriction and growing bump in my left groin probably for last few months. It got worse as I started to do deeper exercises on the reformer so decided to have it checked out a couple of weeks ago. No real pain at any time…just discomfort. No big deal.<br>
Doc first thought it might be a hernia but ultrasounds found it is not. Followed up with MRI with probable lipoma diagnosed…..not supposed to be related to any other issues.<br>
So was lined up to have it removed yesterday afternoon….supposedly in and out of hospital in maybe 4 to 5 hours. Oops!<br>
When they opened the thing they found it had pushed in underneath the muscle layer and had to cut quite a bit deeper to get it out. So I had to stay the night and now hobble around with a bloody external drain to the wound that looks like something from a Frankenstein movie.<br>
Hip / groin movement will have to be restricted for quite a while until this 80mm cut and hole heals up… Not sure when I will get back on the reformer or cycle.…or how much of my conditioning will slip away….. will just have to wait and see.<br>
It was “interesting†to watch the post-op and overnight staff trying to give me some prescribed Endone. I tried to tell them in the nicest possible way to fuck -off! Not going anywhere near that again! But it really seems like the pain management therapy that I have been taught over the last couple of years simply moves the pain threshold to where you want it. You even do this sub-consciously after a while….so it simply kicked in after the op. Unexpected surprise and bonus….I’ll take it….<br>
Speedbump…..</p> -
<p>Great attitude mate. Glad to hear the op went well and you are putting your new skills to use :good1:</p>
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Amazing fight mate. Truly amazing.
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<p>Four weeks since the little op. Very happy with the recovery. Did a short session on both the stationary cycle and reformer this week……All OK.</p>
<p>Had to reduce the range and resistance on the reformer a bit but I think I will get back to previous range quickly.<br>
Very little pain…….groin just stiff with a blob of scar tissue….will soften and mould away over time.<br>
Was surprised to see how much weight I gained over the last couple of weeks…..88kg now.<br>
Need to keep it closer to 80………will have to cut back a bit on the droë wors and cheese!<br>
Cold weather flab maybe……</p>
<p>The next challenge is to completely stop using the lift........realistically about a three month target I think. </p>
<p>Even if I change to using the staircase as my main exercise and cut back on the other stuff....the real world advantage will be worth it.</p>
<p>So there....that is the challenge.</p>
