Movie review thread...
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Anthony Bourdain Said These 4 Movies Inspired Him Most
Anthony Bourdain loved movies. He had many favorites but some he used as a source of constant inspiration for his shows.
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Die Hard 2
As a big fan of the original, it's surprising that this is the first time I've watched the sequel through from beginning to end. God it's shit. Gaping holes in the plot you could land a plane in. In a blizzard.
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Steven Seagal on Hook for SEC Crypto Fine Despite Move to Moscow
Seagal agreed to settle the commission’s allegations that he’d been promised $250,000 in cash and $750,000 in tokens for promoting an initial coin offering for Bitcoiin2Gen. In social media posts, Seagal had urged fans not to miss out on the offering. The actor settled the allegations without admitting or denying wrongdoing.
Seagal, who now lives in Moscow, hasn’t responded to the SEC’s repeated demands after making his initial payment, according to the commission. Russian President Vladimir Putin issued a presidential decree in 2016 granting the actor Russian citizenship.
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@nzzp said in Re: Movie review thread...:
re-re-re-re-re-re-watching Princess Bride with some (virtual) friends.
It's just sensational. So many quotable lines.
'never start a land war in Asia'
'rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles'
Just a wondeful film. Aged like wine.
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Ape VS Monster
.. I'm feeling way too tired to do this schtick just now, and I suspect that is in large part due to this fucking film.
But, in the interest of the Public Good, I'll give it a short red hot go...TL;DR:
- Made by The Asylum
- Released soon after Godzilla vs Kong
So - yeah, as long as you understand all those references, you pretty much know what's about to assault your eyeballs, ears, and brain.
Look - I think I might have bothered to write a review of the actual Godzilla-versing-Kong - and mentioned that at many, many points - my brain was trying to tell me how stupid some plot point or action was... and then my deeper brain reminded me "you're watching a movie about a giant ape fighting a giant reptilian monster with radioactive breath, fuckhead, just chill"
Well - I went through that brain-cycle many, many times this evening - with the added caveat of "you deliberately decided to watch a movie made by The Asylum, with Eric Roberts, about a giant Ape fighting a giant reptilian Monster... EVERYTHING wrong with this movie was to be expected, and you signed up for... now give me a whisky, I fucking quit"
I mean... at this point, it's as if they're just doubling down on their reputation.
So, so much absurdity.... I once again hesitate to call any of it out... because the entire fucking thing is just nonsense from start to finish. (But... yes, yes, I know - an Asylum film called Ape vs Monster... what did I expect? fuck.)Possibly my favourite point - was a group of protagonists seeing a bridge which has clearly been torn asunder by a monster, seeing a train approach (approach... as in literally 2 seconds away from hitting gorge) - trying to call the train authority to warn them off, obviously too late... watching the monster rise from the gorge and pick up the fucking train to see if it's tasty, and their immediate reaction is... "Shit, that bridge was the only way to get this vehicle across that gorge, I guess we're walking..."
And yeah, just to rub the salt in the wound:
- Tit-watch: zero
- It's hinted at that our un-lovable protagonist has a sweet sweet phallic past with another character, but at no point does that play out to the scene we all want
1 monkey (it's clearly a fucking monkey (most of the time), not an ape, and our animal loving "hero" never, at any point, corrects anybody about this) - out of 5 russian commie scum on zoom calls, seeming more worried about the destruction of Washington DC than the yankee imperialist dogs.
I'd been putting off watching that for fucking weeks... I knew it was gonna be bad.
I'm really, REALLY not looking forward to bloody Assault on Station 33... -
@kruse said in Re: Movie review thread...:
Ape VS Monster
.. I'm feeling way too tired to do this schtick just now, and I suspect that is in large part due to this fucking film.
But, in the interest of the Public Good, I'll give it a short red hot go...TL;DR:
- Made by The Asylum
- Released soon after Godzilla vs Kong
So - yeah, as long as you understand all those references, you pretty much know what's about to assault your eyeballs, ears, and brain.
Look - I think I might have bothered to write a review of the actual Godzilla-versing-Kong - and mentioned that at many, many points - my brain was trying to tell me how stupid some plot point or action was... and then my deeper brain reminded me "you're watching a movie about a giant ape fighting a giant reptilian monster with radioactive breath, fuckhead, just chill"
Well - I went through that brain-cycle many, many times this evening - with the added caveat of "you deliberately decided to watch a movie made by The Asylum, with Eric Roberts, about a giant Ape fighting a giant reptilian Monster... EVERYTHING wrong with this movie was to be expected, and you signed up for... now give me a whisky, I fucking quit"
I mean... at this point, it's as if they're just doubling down on their reputation.
So, so much absurdity.... I once again hesitate to call any of it out... because the entire fucking thing is just nonsense from start to finish. (But... yes, yes, I know - an Asylum film called Ape vs Monster... what did I expect? fuck.)Possibly my favourite point - was a group of protagonists seeing a bridge which has clearly been torn asunder by a monster, seeing a train approach (approach... as in literally 2 seconds away from hitting gorge) - trying to call the train authority to warn them off, obviously too late... watching the monster rise from the gorge and pick up the fucking train to see if it's tasty, and their immediate reaction is... "Shit, that bridge was the only way to get this vehicle across that gorge, I guess we're walking..."
And yeah, just to rub the salt in the wound:
- Tit-watch: zero
- It's hinted at that our un-lovable protagonist has a sweet sweet phallic past with another character, but at no point does that play out to the scene we all want
1 monkey (it's clearly a fucking monkey (most of the time), not an ape, and our animal loving "hero" never, at any point, corrects anybody about this) - out of 5 russian commie scum on zoom calls, seeming more worried about the destruction of Washington DC than the yankee imperialist dogs.
I'd been putting off watching that for fucking weeks... I knew it was gonna be bad.
I'm really, REALLY not looking forward to bloody Assault on Station 33...Great stuff but for some weird reason I'd love to hear a Russian accent on a zoom call..
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Cruella. When Mrs CF decided this was the family movie for the night I went in with zero expectations, but I really enjoyed it. The movie is set in the 60s, a prequel explaining the origins of Cruella de Vil, protagonist from 101 Dalmatians. It was darker than I expected, had a very strong cast including excellent performances from Emma Stone and Emma Thompson, surrounded by solid acting from a bunch of support players including Mark Strong of Kingsman fame. Complete with a cracking soundtrack I was suitably impressed. A very easy 4 Dalmatians out of 5 murderous mothers
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I know that WW84 has already been reviewed in here and dissed by many, but I thought I’d while away an hour or so seeing as the cricket finished early.
First thing to say is that Gal remains hotter than a hot thing but is hottest in normal clothes, particularly evening wear.
The next thing to notice is the seemingly minimal budget. They spent SFA on the writing, very little on the sfx, next to nothing on the direction and didn’t bother at all with the editing.
The one question that remains worthwhile asking is: did this film kill the franchise before it even got going? It was that shit.
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There is a animated Witcher movie on Netflix, Nightmare of the wolf, was fun, made me start a new run through of Witcher 3
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Watched MOneyball...what a shit film, it was basically the seed that helped Ireland to beating the ABs!
Seriously though, very good movie, even better cos it is was a true story, Pitt and Hill were both v-good!
4 gets on base out of 5 predictable endings haha
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So the wife and I looked for something serious to watch on the weekend and obviously ended up watching fatman.
It has an absurd story line which i knew going into this anyway and critics had panned it, which only spurred me further to watch it. Still it was not as bad as I was expecting, however if they had decided to take this a bit further and did a bit of fusion with Bad Santa they could have made a cult classic. A few funny one liners, drug references, tit watch greater than zero and I would have been laughing at absurdness instead of waiting for this "action flick" to finish.
3 hamsters out 5 dead elves
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Jungle Cruise
This is a good movie. Entertaining, well timed and written. It stars Emily Blunt which in of itself makes it a must see. Dwayne Johnson showing that he's a natural for comedies. And Jake Whitehall playing a mix of himself and his father.
One for families, one for adults. One for the lonely in quarantine who want to be entertained.
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@antipodean said in Re: Movie review thread...:
Jungle Cruise
This is a good movie. Entertaining, well timed and written. It stars Emily Blunt which in of itself makes it a must see. Dwayne Johnson showing that he's a natural for comedies. And Jake Whitehall playing a mix of himself and his father.
One for families, one for adults. One for the lonely in quarantine who want to be entertained.
Just waiting for it to be free on Disney+. Watched the making of Mandalorian series instead. Outstanding
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Assault on VA-33
- made by "Deinstitutionalized, LLC"
- ... which, I assume, is made up of disillusioned ex-employees of The Asylum
And therefore, I assumed I was going to get a really, REALLY shit version of "Assault on Precinct 13" - whether that be the classic, or remake... I wasn't looking forward to it.
Instead - just got a really shit version of Die Hard.- In some ways, it was a pleasantly surprising just-shit not-absolute-shit film. Not as sacrilegious as I expected, just typical crappy... shit.
- Tit-watch: zero
- Nothing else to say. It's just as tediously shitty as everything above would lead you to expect.
Not sure I've ever used the word "shit" as many times to describe a movie... but at least it's better than "boring".
(Don't get me wrong - the tedious scene-setting for the first 30 minutes or so... boring as shit. But when the action starts, it's just crap, but not overly boring crap.)
1 shitty character stereotypes out of 5 shitty characters who are repeatedly fucking terrible at their jobs but made out to be heroes or antiheroes. -
@kruse said in Re: Movie review thread...:
Assault on VA-33
- made by "Deinstitutionalized, LLC"
- ... which, I assume, is made up of disillusioned ex-employees of The Asylum
And therefore, I assumed I was going to get a really, REALLY shit version of "Assault on Precinct 13" - whether that be the classic, or remake... I wasn't looking forward to it.
Instead - just got a really shit version of Die Hard.Otherwise known as Die Hard 2.
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‘Dune’: Early Reviews Call Denis Villeneuve’s Film Both Brilliant and Disappointing
Here's a review roundup of Denis Villeneuve's 'Dune' following its Venice Film Festival premiere.
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@tim hmmm...will watch but might not go to the cinema
i have to say i was a little bit disappointed with the book after reading it for the first time last year
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@tim said in Re: Movie review thread...:
‘Dune’: Early Reviews Call Denis Villeneuve’s Film Both Brilliant and Disappointing
Here's a review roundup of Denis Villeneuve's 'Dune' following its Venice Film Festival premiere.
It would be nice if you could instantly see whether a critic and yourself ever shared the same opinion on movies, so if a critic panned it you could either know instantly you'd agree or love it.
I'm going to see Dune regardless.
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@kiwiwomble I remember finding the anachronistic "human potential" stuff pretty off-putting when I tried to read it a long time ago.
