More from the 'Human's are Morons' Catelogue

jegga

In 2011 North and South had an article about the fuckups midwives had made mostly due to them treating doctors as a last resort, the midwives council complained about the magazine cover but refused to debate the facts of the article-because they didn't have a leg to stand on. You can read the idiotic complaints they made here
<a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10738247'>http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10738247</a>
 
I know by and large they do a great job but the more feral among them have politicised childbirth and the result is needless deaths like the woman I mentioned first.

Nepia

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="jegga" data-cid="566972" data-time="1458808867">
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When Helen Clark was minister of health in the Lange government she started the process to push doctors out of the process. 

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Ah, so you're David Farrar and not Whaleoil. ;)
 
 
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="taniwharugby" data-cid="566960" data-time="1458808088">
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Based on our experience with our kids being born (both hospital births and by c-section) Midwives are amazing! 
 
They get buggar all pay, and so they spend all that time with the mother leading to the birth, if they hand it over to a Dr for the birth, they dont get the fee (least thats how it worked when TR Jnr was born) 
 
So our midwife worked her ass off, spent numerous hours (>48 for #1 and >15 for #2) at hospital while my wife was in labout only for both to be born by c-section (with one at 9pd 14 and the other at 10pd 5, was always on the cards) she got no fee, but never did we feel she was jeopardising my wife of unborn childs safety for the sake of a fee.
 
Those that do mid-wifery dont do so for the money! 
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They get fees for the steps along the way and IIRC they still get some sort of compensation if present for the birth (deep in my files somewhere I've got the fee schedule from work I did in this area a few years back - I'll try find them tomorrow).
 
I think the implication* that midwives would put the life of the baby (and mother) in danger to keep the birth fee is frankly bullshit. Yeah you might get the occasional one or two who think they don't need to go up the chain like the stupid biddy Jegga posted about above, but that happens in all sectors of the medical profession.
 
*Not saying you're implying that.
 
 
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="taniwharugby" data-cid="564161" data-time="1457768037">
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well it didnt have the desired effect on my wife, as they put it in the wrong spot, which caused the extra fluids putting pressure on the nerves, thats why they had to do it again.
 
When I was living in the UK, I went running in the rain and slipped on some wet flint on a horse track and sliced my hand open...ended up at A & E for stitches and as the dude was starting to insert the needle to sew me up after a local, I said I could feel it, so he gave me more, still felt it, long story short, local didnt work, not allowed to give me more, sew me up with no anaesthetic aint too much fun
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I got a local anaesthetic for a deep cut on my cheek, it was the most painful experience I've ever had. I'm not certain that 6 or so pokes with a syringe wasn't more painful than just getting the stitches, I still flippin felt the stitches. I was at a private A&E in Christchurch with a dimwit English doctor who also sent me how with a broken ankle saying it was fine.

jegga

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Nepia" data-cid="566998" data-time="1458814176">
<div>
Ah, so you're David Farrar and not Whaleoil. ;)
 
 
They get fees for the steps along the way and IIRC they still get some sort of compensation if present for the birth (deep in my files somewhere I've got the fee schedule from work I did in this area a few years back - I'll try find them tomorrow).
 
I think the implication* that midwives would put the life of the baby (and mother) in danger to keep the birth fee is frankly bullshit. Yeah you might get the occasional one or two who think they don't need to go up the chain like the stupid biddy Jegga posted about above, but that happens in all sectors of the medical profession.
 
*Not saying you're implying that.
 
 
 
 
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Not sure why you addded the Farrer accusation there. Apparently you know imagine I look like the penguin from Batman. cheers for that.
 
Yeah there are different fees because they quite often cover each others births because its not possible for your midwife to be available 100% of the time, I'm glad you added that I wasn't implying that she was trying to keep the birth fee. I know some north and south articles are available online so that one might interest you, most midwives do a great job but as the article pointed out theres a few ferals in there that have their own agendas.
 
<a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/parenting/68674972/discredited-vaccine-advice-endangers-babies.html'>http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/parenting/68674972/discredited-vaccine-advice-endangers-babies.html</a>
<a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11507845'>http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11507845</a>

Nepia

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="jegga" data-cid="567003" data-time="1458815026">
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Not sure why you addded the Farrer accusation there. Apparently you know imagine I look like the penguin from Batman. cheers for that.
 
Yeah there are different fees because they quite often cover each others births because its not possible for your midwife to be available 100% of the time, I'm glad you added that I wasn't implying that she was trying to keep the birth fee. I know some north and south articles are available online so that one might interest you, most midwives do a great job but as the article pointed out theres a few ferals in there that have their own agendas.
 
<a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/parenting/68674972/discredited-vaccine-advice-endangers-babies.html'>http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/parenting/68674972/discredited-vaccine-advice-endangers-babies.html</a>
<a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11507845'>http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11507845</a>
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That bolded bit was almost exactly the same as a from a comment from on Farrar's blog. Sheesh, it's a rough one, being imagined as the Penguin or as Slater, I wouldn't wish that on anyone, so apologies ;). 
 
As you note, most midwives do a great job (and you know we have the same views on anti-vacc), but you seem to be pushing the ferals to the forefront.

jegga

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Nepia" data-cid="567009" data-time="1458815794">
<div>
That bolded bit was almost exactly the same as a from a comment from on Farrar's blog. Sheesh, it's a rough one, being imagined as the Penguin or as Slater, I wouldn't wish that on anyone, so apologies ;). 
 
As you note, most midwives do a great job (and you know we have the same views on anti-vacc), but you seem to be pushing the ferals to the forefront.
</div>
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Apology accepted.
 
I wish I could give you a link to the N and S article , it was a real eye opener . Suffice to say the feral element didn't come out of it well hence the complaint only being about the cover not the actual content of the article.

Rancid Schnitzel

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Nepia" data-cid="566998" data-time="1458814176">
<div>
Ah, so you're David Farrar and not Whaleoil. ;)
 
 
They get fees for the steps along the way and IIRC they still get some sort of compensation if present for the birth (deep in my files somewhere I've got the fee schedule from work I did in this area a few years back - I'll try find them tomorrow).
 
I think the implication* that midwives would put the life of the baby (and mother) in danger to keep the birth fee is frankly bullshit. Yeah you might get the occasional one or two who think they don't need to go up the chain like the stupid biddy Jegga posted about above, but that happens in all sectors of the medical profession.
 
*Not saying you're implying that.
 
 
I got a local anaesthetic for a deep cut on my cheek, it was the most painful experience I've ever had. I'm not certain that 6 or so pokes with a syringe wasn't more painful than just getting the stitches, I still flippin felt the stitches. I was at a private A&E in Christchurch with a dimwit English doctor who also sent me how with a broken ankle saying it was fine. 
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Totally agree with that. I've sometimes felt that a bit of rolled up leather in the mouth and just getting on with it would probably be less painful in the long run.
 
As for mid-wives, the ones we had were amazing. Fark childbirth is a surreal experience.

Catogrande

You must have a bloody good memory Rancid.

Rancid Schnitzel

Sorry mate that one went right over my head.

Catogrande

If you remember experiencing childbirth.
 
But of course you've now sort of spoiled my pedantry.

TeWaio

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Catogrande" data-cid="567031" data-time="1458821221">
<div>
If you remember experiencing childbirth.
 
But of course you've now sort of spoiled my pedantry.
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Good, but not as good as Jaguares-gate.

Catogrande

Yes I appear to be on a roll TW.

taniwharugby

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Nepia" data-cid="566998" data-time="1458814176">
Ah, so you're David Farrar and not Whaleoil. ;) 
 
 
They get fees for the steps along the way and IIRC they still get some sort of compensation if present for the birth (deep in my files somewhere I've got the fee schedule from work I did in this area a few years back - I'll try find them tomorrow). 
 
I think the implication* that midwives would put the life of the baby (and mother) in danger to keep the birth fee is frankly bullshit. Yeah you might get the occasional one or two who think they don't need to go up the chain like the stupid biddy Jegga posted about above, but that happens in all sectors of the medical profession. 
 
*Not saying you're implying that. 
 
 
I got a local anaesthetic for a deep cut on my cheek, it was the most painful experience I've ever had. I'm not certain that 6 or so pokes with a syringe wasn't more painful than just getting the stitches, I still flippin felt the stitches. I was at a private A&E in Christchurch with a dimwit English doctor who also sent me how with a broken ankle saying it was fine.
</blockquote>
 I meant the final birthing fee...we were lucky, our midwife was excellent (same one for both kids) 
When I was about 18 I sliced my thumb open, they put the syringe into the wound to administer the anaesthetic, that WAS more painful than the cut itself!

Mokey

My sister chose to go for a home birth with her first kid, and with that came a hippy, anti pain med, lousy communicator midwife, who I could have happily face-smashed about a thousand times during the 26 hour process. She and her student midwife spent most of the time in another room writing stuff in her exercise book, leaving my sister alone with her husband and me, in a lot of pain, scared shitless and not knowing where she was at, if it was normal etc etc. BIL freaked out a bit (was kinda funny as he is a tough as nails farmer type) so I was the one walking her, rubbing her back, getting my hand munched. All turned out fine, but recovery was long, and it mindfucked her totally.
For second kid she was in labour as we were at Chipmunks (the kiddie playground), so I had one eye on toddler, while timing her contractions, hoping like hell we weren't going to have an oops. But this time she had a fabulous, chatty, super professional midwife in Tauranga, had the kid in Tauranga hospital and was in a cafe a few hours later, newborn in tow lol. Ditto for kid three.

Catogrande

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="taniwharugby" data-cid="567038" data-time="1458845999">
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... When I was about 18 I sliced my thumb open, they put the syringe into the wound to administer the anaesthetic, that WAS more painful than the cut itself!
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</blockquote>
 
Daughter No2 went wading in the river and trod on a broken bottle, sliced the underside of her foot near the big toe and second toe. Cut it down to the tendon. It looked like the inside of a butcher's dustbin. The doc had to check to see if the tendon had been nicked at all and then sew her up. They injected the local straight into the wound and the poor kid screamed. They then sewed her up before the local took effect and that was easier than the bloody jab.

jegga

I sliced my knuckle off with an angle grinder , when they pumped it full of local it looked like a sausage because I guess there's not much room between the bone and skin . The doctor was pretty good though, I don't even have a scar . 
Another time I punched s hole in my palm with an auger bit, I went to the doc and it turned out he was the Manu Samoa team doctor . We had heaps to talk about while the local did its thing, before he stitched me up he was showing me which bit inside my hand did what, got me to move my fingers so I could see the tendon moving etc . It was a pretty interesting way to spend an hour or so.

antipodean

I'm fairly certain I win this. Having a vasectomy and they didn't put enough local in on one side. Felt like an elephant had stood on my balls so the doctor had to administer another needle...

Mokey

I was getting a pre-cancerous mole cut out of the top of my back, so the surgeon injected the local, waited a bit then went scalpel.
Me: scream.
Dr waited for a bit, tried another shot of anesthetic then scalpel.
Me: scream.
Dr injected shot 3, then cut.
Me: scream.
Poor surgeon was just about having kittens when he injected shot 4. But finally the 4th shot worked and he was able to cut the offender out. Lucky it did work though, cos he had to go deeper than he thought to get the fucking tail. They had no idea why the previous stuff didn't work.
Let me tell you, multiple stabs with a scalpel close to your neck where there are so many nerve endings, NOT FUN.

Paekakboyz

oooh I have a good one.
 
Playing cricket on deck with a tennis ball. Ball gets hit behind some stacked wood. Put my hand behind the wood stack to get the ball. Miss the vertically stacked sheets of glass that were protected behind wood stack. Run my hand down the edge of a sheet of glass, cutting pretty deep between index and ring finger on right hand. Cue blood, pain and general madness (was about 9 years old).
 
Straight to doc and the multiple anesthetic shots straight into the gaping wound!! with my little bro sitting nearby saying 'wow, that looks painful'. No shit little bro! Folks evicted little bro from the room but fuck that was painful. Didn't feel the stitches but was well woozy with pain by that stage. Have a gnarly scar and you can even see all the needle holes too.
 
But it wasn't needles in my nuts though, phew!

jegga

Back to the original theme of people being morons , girl gets really ugly tattoo and is gutted about it <a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://m.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11611396'>http://m.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11611396</a> 
She looks quite hot though .

Paekakboyz

Why not judge on the finished project? although maybe they could have done more to map out the stages of the tat. So she knew it might look pretty ave until finished??

The Silver Fern

More from the &#39;Human&#39;s are Morons&#39; Catelogue

More from the 'Human's are Morons' Catelogue