More from the 'Human's are Morons' Catelogue
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<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Nepia" data-cid="566998" data-time="1458814176">
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<p>Ah, so you're David Farrar and not Whaleoil. ;)</p>
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<p>They get fees for the steps along the way and IIRC they still get some sort of compensation if present for the birth (deep in my files somewhere I've got the fee schedule from work I did in this area a few years back - I'll try find them tomorrow).</p>
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<p>I think the implication* that midwives would put the life of the baby (and mother) in danger to keep the birth fee is frankly bullshit. Yeah you might get the occasional one or two who think they don't need to go up the chain like the stupid biddy Jegga posted about above, but that happens in all sectors of the medical profession.</p>
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<p>*Not saying you're implying that.</p>
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<p><strong>I got a local anaesthetic for a deep cut on my cheek, it was the most painful experience I've ever had.</strong> I'm not certain that 6 or so pokes with a syringe wasn't more painful than just getting the stitches, I still flippin felt the stitches. I was at a private A&E in Christchurch with a dimwit English doctor who also sent me how with a broken ankle saying it was fine. </p>
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<p>Totally agree with that. I've sometimes felt that a bit of rolled up leather in the mouth and just getting on with it would probably be less painful in the long run.</p>
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<p>As for mid-wives, the ones we had were amazing. Fark childbirth is a surreal experience.</p> -
<p>You must have a bloody good memory Rancid.</p>
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<p>Sorry mate that one went right over my head.</p>
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<p>If you remember experiencing childbirth.</p>
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<p>But of course you've now sort of spoiled my pedantry.</p> -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Catogrande" data-cid="567031" data-time="1458821221">
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<p>If you remember experiencing childbirth.</p>
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<p>But of course you've now sort of spoiled my pedantry.</p>
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Good, but not as good as Jaguares-gate.</p> -
<p>Yes I appear to be on a roll TW.</p>
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<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Nepia" data-cid="566998" data-time="1458814176">
<p>Ah, so you're David Farrar and not Whaleoil. ;)<br>
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They get fees for the steps along the way and IIRC they still get some sort of compensation if present for the birth (deep in my files somewhere I've got the fee schedule from work I did in this area a few years back - I'll try find them tomorrow).<br>
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I think the implication* that midwives would put the life of the baby (and mother) in danger to keep the birth fee is frankly bullshit. Yeah you might get the occasional one or two who think they don't need to go up the chain like the stupid biddy Jegga posted about above, but that happens in all sectors of the medical profession.<br>
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*Not saying you're implying that.<br>
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I got a local anaesthetic for a deep cut on my cheek, it was the most painful experience I've ever had. I'm not certain that 6 or so pokes with a syringe wasn't more painful than just getting the stitches, I still flippin felt the stitches. I was at a private A&E in Christchurch with a dimwit English doctor who also sent me how with a broken ankle saying it was fine.</p>
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<br><p>I meant the final birthing fee...we were lucky, our midwife was excellent (same one for both kids)<br><br>
When I was about 18 I sliced my thumb open, they put the syringe into the wound to administer the anaesthetic, that WAS more painful than the cut itself!</p> -
<p>My sister chose to go for a home birth with her first kid, and with that came a hippy, anti pain med, lousy communicator midwife, who I could have happily face-smashed about a thousand times during the 26 hour process. She and her student midwife spent most of the time in another room writing stuff in her exercise book, leaving my sister alone with her husband and me, in a lot of pain, scared shitless and not knowing where she was at, if it was normal etc etc. BIL freaked out a bit (was kinda funny as he is a tough as nails farmer type) so I was the one walking her, rubbing her back, getting my hand munched. All turned out fine, but recovery was long, and it mindfucked her totally.</p>
<p>For second kid she was in labour as we were at Chipmunks (the kiddie playground), so I had one eye on toddler, while timing her contractions, hoping like hell we weren't going to have an oops. But this time she had a fabulous, chatty, super professional midwife in Tauranga, had the kid in Tauranga hospital and was in a cafe a few hours later, newborn in tow lol. Ditto for kid three.</p> -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="taniwharugby" data-cid="567038" data-time="1458845999">
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<p>... When I was about 18 I sliced my thumb open, they put the syringe into the wound to administer the anaesthetic, that WAS more painful than the cut itself!</p>
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<p>Daughter No2 went wading in the river and trod on a broken bottle, sliced the underside of her foot near the big toe and second toe. Cut it down to the tendon. It looked like the inside of a butcher's dustbin. The doc had to check to see if the tendon had been nicked at all and then sew her up. They injected the local straight into the wound and the poor kid screamed. They then sewed her up before the local took effect and that was easier than the bloody jab.</p> -
I sliced my knuckle off with an angle grinder , when they pumped it full of local it looked like a sausage because I guess there's not much room between the bone and skin . The doctor was pretty good though, I don't even have a scar .<br><br>
Another time I punched s hole in my palm with an auger bit, I went to the doc and it turned out he was the Manu Samoa team doctor . We had heaps to talk about while the local did its thing, before he stitched me up he was showing me which bit inside my hand did what, got me to move my fingers so I could see the tendon moving etc . It was a pretty interesting way to spend an hour or so. -
<p>I'm fairly certain I win this. Having a vasectomy and they didn't put enough local in on one side. Felt like an elephant had stood on my balls so the doctor had to administer another needle...</p>
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<p>I was getting a pre-cancerous mole cut out of the top of my back, so the surgeon injected the local, waited a bit then went scalpel.</p>
<p>Me: scream.</p>
<p>Dr waited for a bit, tried another shot of anesthetic then scalpel.</p>
<p>Me: scream.</p>
<p>Dr injected shot 3, then cut.</p>
<p>Me: scream.</p>
<p>Poor surgeon was just about having kittens when he injected shot 4. But finally the 4th shot worked and he was able to cut the offender out. Lucky it did work though, cos he had to go deeper than he thought to get the fucking tail. They had no idea why the previous stuff didn't work.</p>
<p>Let me tell you, multiple stabs with a scalpel close to your neck where there are so many nerve endings, NOT FUN.</p> -
<p>oooh I have a good one.</p>
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<p>Playing cricket on deck with a tennis ball. Ball gets hit behind some stacked wood. Put my hand behind the wood stack to get the ball. Miss the vertically stacked sheets of glass that were protected behind wood stack. Run my hand <em>down </em>the edge of a sheet of glass, cutting pretty deep between index and ring finger on right hand. Cue blood, pain and general madness (was about 9 years old).</p>
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<p>Straight to doc and the multiple <span style="color:rgb(40,40,40);font-family:helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">anesthetic shots straight into the gaping wound!! with my little bro sitting nearby saying 'wow, that looks painful'. No shit little bro! Folks evicted little bro from the room but fuck that was painful. Didn't feel the stitches but was well woozy with pain by that stage. Have a gnarly scar and you can even see all the needle holes too.</span></p>
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<p><span style="color:rgb(40,40,40);font-family:helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">But it wasn't needles in my nuts though, phew!</span></p> -
Back to the original theme of people being morons , girl gets really ugly tattoo and is gutted about it <a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://m.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11611396'>http://m.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11611396</a><br>
She looks quite hot though . -
<p>Why not judge on the finished project? although maybe they could have done more to map out the stages of the tat. So she knew it might look pretty ave until finished??</p>
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<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="antipodean" data-cid="567102" data-time="1458869527">
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<p>I'm fairly certain I win this. Having a vasectomy and they didn't put enough local in on one side. Felt like an elephant had stood on my balls so the doctor had to administer another needle...</p>
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<p>ouch...I got shot in the balls playing paintball, one ball tripled in size...but yeah you win the worst game
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<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Paekakboyz" data-cid="567107" data-time="1458873237"><p>
Why not judge on the finished project? although maybe they could have done more to map out the stages of the tat. So she knew it might look pretty ave until finished??</p></blockquote>i<br><br>
i think there's more to this than she's saying , like are Snow White and Cinderella supposed to be zombies ? -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Mokey" data-cid="567103" data-time="1458870162">
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<p>I was getting a pre-cancerous mole cut out of the top of my back, so the surgeon injected the local, waited a bit then went scalpel.</p>
<p>Me: scream.</p>
<p>Dr waited for a bit, tried another shot of anesthetic then scalpel.</p>
<p>Me: scream.</p>
<p>Dr injected shot 3, then cut.</p>
<p>Me: scream.</p>
<p>Poor surgeon was just about having kittens when he injected shot 4. But finally the 4th shot worked and he was able to cut the offender out. Lucky it did work though, cos he had to go deeper than he thought to get the fucking tail. They had no idea why the previous stuff didn't work.</p>
<p>Let me tell you, multiple stabs with a scalpel close to your neck where there are so many nerve endings, NOT FUN.</p>
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<p>My multi- anesthetic story is a root canal - 3 shots and still not numb. Dentist says he's going in anyway - drills into the tooth till he hits the root, then calls in the dentist in the next room to hold me down while he injects the 4 shot straight into the root.</p>
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<p>Worst pain was when I tore the tendon off my knee while recovering after a kjnee reconstruction - had less than 40% movement bending it after a month recovering on my back, when going back to work on my first day on crutches. Slipped on wet footpath, knee buckled under me and bent it all the way back. Tendon that runs over your knee and attaches to your shin broke off, and rolled back up over my knee. Pretty sore but worst part was in the hospital where the A&E doc did not believe me when I told him what happened, and before they gave me any pain killers forced me to try and lift my leg when lying on my back. I think all of A&E heard me yell a 30 second string of obscenities, directed at the doctor and what a useless fluffybunny he was</p> -
<p>aaand the apology update about her spiteful post...</p>
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<p><a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11611757'>http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11611757</a></p> -
<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="Paekakboyz" data-cid="567132" data-time="1458887233">
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<p>aaand the apology update about her spiteful post...</p>
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<p><a data-ipb='nomediaparse' href='http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11611757'>http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=11611757</a></p>
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<p>To be fair to her, the bottom bits aren't guidelines and they look shit.</p>
