Building myself back up
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Been AWOL from TSF for a few weeks. The reason for this is that my beautiful wife passed away suddenly. We'd had high hopes for immunotherapy, but unfortunately the damage had been done and fluid collected around the heart. She'd been so incredibly strong up until then, but even she couldn't fight it.
I always thought if there was nothing more to be done, we'd at least have a few months to prepare. Sadly it was all over in about a week. To say it was devastating is an understatement. Having to tell my boys was just horrific. I was and still am absolutely crushed.
We are slowly getting back on our feet, but it will take time. The boys have been incredibly brave, but I constantly worry about how they'll adjust. Do you ever really get over something like this?
Personally, I have to pick up the pieces both mentally and physically. When all this started, I developed a shocking chest infection which I couldn't shake. I coughed so much that I tore a muscle in my back. I also barely ate or slept. think I lost about 5 kilos. I dragged myself back to the gym for a couple of light sessions last week and that helped. I'm eating and sleeping better as well. The drop from where I was before has been dramatic, but Im in a much better state now than I was. I realised before how important exercise was to my mental state and I'm more conscious of that than ever.
I'll continue to take it fairly easy the first few weeks and hopefully get the desire to gradually ramp things up.
This morning:
Chest:
BP: 20,15, 10, 10
Incline BP: same
Superset: 15 cable crossovers plus 10 cable pushes
500m on rowing machine plus 20 pushups x 4. -
Fuck mate, that's dreadful news. Hope the exercise helps.
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Dude! For crying out loud man that's devestating news.
I'm not big on the Oversize forum. Long story (to do with stents and shit and a rather unhealthy life style) which I won't bore you with.
And I've had a number of life changing moments in my recentish (last 10 years) life.
But nothing quite so dramatic. Well maybe as dramatic but in a different way.
So anything we can do to encourage you, us weirdo pseudo friends on the the interweb, let us know.
Chin up, and cuddle your lads. And let them cuddle you.
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@rancid-schnitzel So sorry to hear that mate. Can't even comprehend what you must be going through. You've got the right attitude with getting the exercise in to improve mental state, its been a non-negotiable of mine the last few years more so for the mental well being than the physical. Keep it up even when its the absolute last thing you feel like doing, sometimes even just commiting to only 5 mins can make all the difference often you'll end up doing a full workout from there anyway. All the best mate.
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So sorry to hear the news @Rancid-Schnitzel. Big aroha to you and your boys, and the rest of your whanau. Really hope you and your boys can find some solace in keeping moving and exercising. Hollah if you ever want a yarn, and I fully endorse Booboo's call on the cuddles and hugs. Kia Kaha mate.
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All the best Ranc. A timely reminder to all of us about what's important in life, thanks for writing mate.
I'm starting to realize that the more sophisticated this world seems to get, life is increasingly about the simple things - decent food, exercise and time with loved ones.
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Thanks so much for your kind words fellas.
I think the best thing is to have lots to do and to stay busy. No point in just sitting at home dwelling over this. I promised my wife that this wouldn't break us and that we'd do her proud. I intend to keep that promise.
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Pretty good session this morning and good start to the day.
Shoulders:
Presses, side raises, front raises, and shrugsFinished off with the rower.
Not feeling like a cripple any more which is nice. Not seeing as much of a wraith in the mirror either.
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Absolutely feel for you mate @Rancid-Schnitzel.
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@rancid-schnitzel Much love to you and yours. A couple of weeks ago I lost two family members in the space of a few days, both unexpectedly, both healthy, active men. Just reinforces the idea to focus on what really matters, which is who you love. I'm glad that exercise is offering a little comfort at this incredibly tough time. All the best.
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@Rancid-Schnitzel my condolences RS, keep strong!
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Thanks again girl and guys.
It's all very up and down. You think you're past it or turning a corner but small things can set you off. But just coming on TSF helps out, so I appreciate you all putting up with my shit for the past few years. You're a great bunch of human beings.
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Wednesday: Son had gymnastics so had 1h30 to kill. Hit legs for first time in weeks. Went OK initially, but suddenly went to jelly. Sensibly moved on to other things.
Did 500m row, 20 push ups x 4
and also 15 burpees plus 20 crunches x 4.
Also went for a 2km run and was good to discover that I can now run without back pain.Still a long way from where I was but getting better faster than expected.
Today: Back
Latpulldowns, seated rows, Incline rows, back extensions.15 burpees, 20 crunches x 4.
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Friday: Arms
Started with 2km row.
Barbell curls, hammers, concentration curls
Overhead tris, pushdownsFelt OK.
Was hungry so smashed a chicken parmagana for lunch and a proper Wiener Schnitzel for dinner.
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Was a nice weekend at the beach which included a little ceremony for my wife. We'll have to go up more often.
Today: Chest
Started with some abs and burpees then:
Flat bench: 20, 15, 10, 10, 6
Incline: 20, 15, 10, 10,
Cable crossovers crossovers plus cable pushes 15 x 3.
100 push-ups.Did the job.
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Tuesday: shoulders, very nice
But
Wednesday: leg day,
I managed to fark up my shoulder. How is that possible on leg day? Well was just finishing up with some burpees and bam, the pain. Hurt just raising my arm.
Feeling a bit better today and hope itll be OK after the weekend. I Absolutely freak out about shoulder injuries, particularly anything that might involve the rotator cuff. Really pissed off it happened on farking leg day.
Might try some cardio tomorrow. Have to do something.
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Age sucks man. I twinged my good knee scrubbing the shower floor and my left wrist doing some very light boxing training. Gym is purely low impact cycling for now, at least its something! (silverlining is I'm catching up on my youtube vids while working out )
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@rembrandt said in Building myself back up:
Age sucks man. I twinged my good knee scrubbing the shower floor and my left wrist doing some very light boxing training. Gym is purely low impact cycling for now, at least its something! (silverlining is I'm catching up on my youtube vids while working out )
And I'm sure there are plenty to catch up on!
Shoulder has improved heaps during the day, but still pretty bloody annoying when a simple burpee can cause damage.
I'm going to blame poor technique or overtraining not age. I'm only 38 (soon 39).....wish I was 19 again.
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Arms today. Probably should have taken day off but it went OK and I was careful. Only pain from hanging leg raises when warming up.
Also managed 2km row without trouble which was a good sign. Will hopefully be 100% or close to it by Monday.
Felt good after this workout, which just shows how much I need to do it.
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Saturday: On my feet all day so plenty of motion but KFC for lunch (which was fucking disgusting, can't recall Zingers being that bad) and then 9 tacos for dinner. Was hungry.
Sunday: Run at oval for the first time since everything happened. Did 10 laps with 5 involving 6 pullups. Shoulder ok but not sure if it's ready for benchpress tomorrow. Run went really well so fitness is still there. Will ramp that up in the coming weeks.
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Monday: Didn't have time. Was a really bad day. Have to make time.
Tuesday: Chest. Shoulder a little ginger but otherwise OK. Good session.
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@rancid-schnitzel gotta give yourself those days when things just don't line up. Good to hear the shoulder is on the improve.
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Bit of a lag here.
Wednesday: Trained while son had gym for hour and a half. Don't usually got into the weights room at around that time (5pm) and it was of course farking jammed. I hate that and perhaps went much faster and harder than necessary. Anyway, did back and was fooking knackered after about 30 minutes. Managed some rows and a bit of running after that but was as drained as a vampire victim. Shoulder held up well though.
Thursday: Legs. Good session.
Friday: Arms. Wasn't big on a dedicated arm day before, but am becoming a fan. I gots my pump on. Some rowing and burpees as well. Did the job.
Today: Hit the oval and of course it pissed down raining when I did, but fuck it I'm from NZ and lived in Norway for 10 years. Some dudes who were playing soccer ran straight under cover and were still there when I left. Considering it's rained non-stop since I guess they're still there.
Anyway 10 laps with 5 involving 10 burpees and 10 dips. Apart from the rain it felt really good. Not back to where I was but not that far off either which is nice.
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Sunday: Eldest has made relay team for state swimming championships so have decided that Sunday swimming at 50 metre pool is back on. Both of us did 20 laps and youngest 12. Was really enjoyable and we all slept soundly. I was in bed by 8:30.
Today: Chest. Up nice and early and gym was empty. Usual chest stuff. Benchpress, Incline press, cable crossovers etc.
Really happy with the way things are progressing from the absolute low point. Problem is I'm spending a month in Norway from mid December so training and eating are likely to be crap. Maybe there'll be a heap of snow so I can roll heaps of snow balls, pull sleds or some shit.
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@jk said in Building myself back up:
Impressive on the swimming mate. Dont think I could ever swim 20 laps (no matter how long the pool was)
Didn't do 20 without stopping but it was a decent effort. Swimming gives you a pretty mean pump too. Always feel great after.
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Tuesday: Shoulders. Good focussed session.
Wednesday: Legs. That went really well but burpees to finish stuffed the shoulder again. Obviously the body is telling me to lay off the burpees. Pissed off, but what can you do. Will take day off today and see how I go tomorrow.
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Backlog!
Took Thursday off, which was a bit annoying but shoulder all good.
Friday: back and arms. Bit rushed, but pretty good session.
Saturday: Got up at crack of dawn to hit north coast. Got there at 7 and had a good 2 and a half hours in the water. Had breakfast, visited some friends and got home in time to vote. Good day. Went a bit ballistic on the food though. 10 tacos, an entire packet of corn chips, 2 Mars bars and a shit load of icecream. Ah well I was hungry.
Sunday: 20 laps. Was a real struggle early on. Must have been battered by the waves a bit the previous day and was sore as. Ended OK and felt great. Swimming is the bomb.
Monday: Chest. Good sharp session.
Tuesday: Forgot mobile and therefore had nothing to do between sets and was very efficient. Should do that more often. Way back in the day I used to bring a book! Anyway, was shoulders and went very well.
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Too busy to train yesterday and surprise surprise was depressed as a mofo. Lack of sleep doesn't help, but I'm clearly on a bit of a tightrope and have to maintain the balance. This is going to be much harder than I expected and I expected it to be farking hard.
Back today. Good session.
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No doubt bro! plus nothing like a good workout to help you have a good sleep. Trying to maintain some kind of balance is the goal, but you shouldn't beat yourself up if there's a bit of wobble from time to time.
Nothing at all easy about what you and yours are dealing with man, but you've got a good sense of what needs to happen (exercise etc) to keep you in a better place. Which will absolutely help with all the other stuff on your plate.
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Arms and legs today. Weird combo, but no-training Wednesday farked things up.
Little time for blasting legs unfortunately, but arms copped it big time.
Feeling better today.
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Shit 16 days.
Training went OK, although I farked up the work/life/sleep balance again. At least I know what I'm doing wrong, but it certainly is a farking tightrope.
Anyway, travelled to Norway on Tuesday. Not really much you can do about that flight. Went via Shanghai, which I was excited about but the sheer bureaucratic incompetence involved in simply getting a connecting flight was something to behold. We had to exit immigration and then check in again at the entrance. That was after standing in line for close to 2 hours to actually get there. Based on what I experienced I don't think they will be our new overlords any time soon.
Training wise, there was plenty of walking across airports, but not much in the way of nutrition.
Got to Oslo and then nearly died of hunger. Mother in law doesn't eat lunch and seems to think small portions of wiener sausages and rice pudding are balanced meals. That's in addition to her being an obsessive compulsive bitch who can't handle having visitors for any longer than 5 minutes. Being minus 11 and without transport, I wasn't exactly in a position to do anything else. Considering the loss we've recently suffered, to say this "welcome" was a slap in the face, is a grotesque understatement. Thankfully we've moved onto other digs. Had my first decent meal on Saturday night and have been getting some much needed calories.
Am meeting an old colleague for a PT session tomorrow morning so am looking forward to that.
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@rancid-schnitzel That sucks mate and the temperature change and jetlag must knock the motivation massively on top of everything else. Good on ya booking a PT sesh, I'm guessing in those temperatures your have to go hard out or freeze!
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Well unfortunately son was chucking his guts out last night and this morning, so no PT for me. Was feeling squeamish myself but seem to be ok now. Problem with these temps you have to get outside and started early or you'll just never get out.
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Ok, so finally got the PT session in today and fark me... talk about an insight into how the 1% live. My mate is a partner at a top law firm and his gym (if I can even call it that) was like a 5 star hotel. It was goddam beautiful.
The PT himself was awesome. Some insane core work and plenty of places that don't usually get hit. In between exercises he fetched us glasses of cold water. Then at the end he asked what flavour of protein drink we wanted and served them with a banana. Farking insane.
I noticed an ancient old crone walking around while we were there. Apparently she was a member of the royal family. This was some seriously exclusive shit.
Anyway, awesome training, awesome place, awesome service but totally 100% unnecessary. Cool experience, but I'll take my YMCA any day even if I could afford that kind of luxury.
But damn it was nice.....